Thursday, June 7, 2012

Scars

I see the scars sin has left on me, on my heart and on my mind.  The past two weeks has been a battle with the wounds of bad decisions, worse really, wounds from a separation from God.  

I have two good friends who are in a battle for their hearts, for their marriage, and for their children.  They have both sinned, both tried to hide it, and both see the battle as being against the other instead of being against the power of darkness.  Their choices are wreaking havoc and they are in a spiritual death spiral.  Trying to stay close to them, trying to help with words and with prayers is bringing back the pain of my own failings and I can clearly see the scars my sins have left behind.  

The scars are reminders.  A reminder of a marriage severed.  A reminder of the pain my children suffer from a family ripped apart.  A reminder of separation from my children, the people I love the most on this earth.  A reminder of a life lived playing Christian but not being a Christ-follower.  
The scars are reminders.  A reminder of a son who left home, pockets full of cash, to live a life of wine, women and song.  A reminder of a father who allowed the son to take off knowing what the future would hold.  A reminder of a son living with pigs.  A reminder of a loving father, a forgiving father, a father who ran to meet his wayward child and then threw a party for him.  

The scars are reminders.  A reminder of reconciliation with God.  A reminder of learning to understand God’s love.  A reminder of learning what forgiveness feels like.  A reminder of how confession leads to healing.  A reminder of how the Holy Spirit will work within me.  A reminder that living a life following Christ is a life of freedom and peace and joy and love and ample helpings of forgiveness given and received.  

As I came through painful days and grew closer to God, I asked that he let me know I was on the right path by using me.  I now have a ministry I really don’t want but one that reminds me God is using me to show others what can happen when hearts are not aligned with God.  I hate the position but am joyous in my Savior’s faith in me and willingness to work through me.  The scars are constant reminders of where I was and where I am and where I want to keep going - walking with God.  The scars are ugly but they allow me to tell a story of beauty.  I pray it will be a story that helps my friends but I know it is only through their desire and the power of God that reconciliation will occur.  

I seek your prayers for their hearts as well as mine as we all walk a road that leaves us exposed to Satan’s schemes but also a road that will allow us to see a Father running towards us, ready to embrace us, ready to throw a party in our honor because His love is so great for my friends, for me and for you.

Grace and peace.  

Jeff Jones
Decatur, Texas

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