Love: Getting the Starting Place Right

Reading biblical texts about love is a lot like going to the doctor.  You know you are in for an “examination!”  1 Peter 1:22-25 doesn’t usually get mentioned in the same breath with some of more well-known love texts.  But, this text provides us with a powerful exhortation about what mature love looks like.  

Peter says:

Now that you have purified yourselves by obeying the truth so that you have sincere love for each other, love one another deeply, from the heart.  For you have been born again, not of perishable seed, but of imperishable, through the living and enduring word of God. For,

   “All people are like grass,

   and all their glory is like the flowers of the field;

  the grass withers and the flowers fall,

   but the word of the Lord endures forever.”

   And this is the word that was preached to you.

Peter says love doesn’t simply sneak up and grab us.  Mature love takes action on our part.  It is intentional.  How often is our personal comfort zone or selfish habits of thought the starting place for how we love people?  Peter’s starting place for understanding love is the gospel and obedience to the same.  He says we should love like Jesus loved because:

1.  We have been purified by obeying the truth of the gospel.  

2.  We were born again of incorruptible seed, the word of God.  

Point?  Something happened to us when we came to Christ.  We came under the power and influence of the gospel.  As such, being born again marries us to the gospel’s style of love.   

How does Peter describe love?

1.  It is sincere.  The greek word (anupocritos) means “without hypocrisy”.  We should not be phony or disingenuous in how we engage people.  He accents it further by saying that love should be “from the heart.”  

2.  Fraternal affection (philadelphos).  This is the kind of love families share within a family unit.  Christians are brought together in God’s family.  We care for each other like members in a close human family care for one another.  What a beautiful picture!  

3.  Fervently.  The greek word (extenos) means to “stretch out the hand.”  It implies earnestness, going after something purposefully and with intensity.  The Message translation reads, “…love one another as if your lives depended on it.”  

Great text on love…right!  Our natural inclination is to think about love and to give love according to how our subjective filters work.  We’ve all done it.  Do I like them?  Do I think they like me?  Have they been mean to me?  Rude?  Ignored me?  Discriminatory?  Arrogant?  I don’t think I have the gift of love for that person.  The gift of love?  Hmmmm?  Peter says we have the calling to love, but he doesn’t say anything about the gift of love.  In fact he later points out some of the things that congest our ability to love and plainly says….”get rid of them!” (2:1-2).     

Loving like Peter describes is a challenge for anyone.  But, it comes with the territory of our calling by virtue of our new birth in the gospel.  As we are presented opportunities to love other people let's set our hearts on Peter's "starting place" for love and see where it takes us, i.e., "I'm a person who has been....so in this moment my calling is to love like..."  Maybe that’s what Jesus meant when he said, “By this all men will know that you are my disciples if you have love for one another” (John 13:35).

Father, loving the way you love is hard.  We can’t do it on our own.  Condition our hearts to your kind of love as we come to see ourselves as people of the gospel.  Awaken us each day to the powerful truth of what the gospel means and what it means to live in it as those called through your Son.  Amen.

Randy Daugherty

Stephenville, Texas

Theme: Humility

Christ Jesus is Our Righteousness

To some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on everybody else, Jesus told this parable:  “Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector.  The Pharisee stood up and prayed about himself: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other men – robbers, evildoers, adulterers – or even like this tax collector.  I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.’

“But the tax collector stood at a distance.  He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner.’

“I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God.  For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted.”  Luke 18:9-14

The age-old struggle with self righteousness is illustrated in Jesus’ parable.  Contrasting points-of-view are portrayed by the two men who went to the temple to pray.  The Pharisee had knowledge about God, but lacked the wisdom to understand truth.  He is able to eloquently list his accomplishments (i.e., fasting and giving and the absence of certain sinful behavior).  He foolishly believes in his own righteousness, since he isn’t as bad as the “sinful” men beneath him.  Unfortunately, pride will be his downfall (Proverbs 18:12).

The second man, a lowly tax collector, lacked the confidence to draw near to the Lord’s presence.  He knows he needs God’s mercy, as he could never justify a righteousness that is earned.  This man, because of his humility, is the one God blesses.  This “sinner” displays the power of God to save believers.  “For in the gospel a righteousness from God is revealed, a righteousness that is by faith” (Romans 1:17).  The spiritual reality is, “All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (Romans 3:23).  The sacrifice of Jesus satisfied God’s requirement for justice.  It is only through faith in Jesus’ blood that we are cleansed.  Do you want to be exalted?  Humble yourself.  Christ Jesus is our righteousness.

Prayer

Dear Lord, have mercy on me, a sinner.  I trust your faithfulness to cleanse me and exalt me.  Righteousness is only through you.  In the name of Christ Jesus, Amen.

Carl Smith

Stephenville, Texas

Theme: Humility

“I’ve never discussed this with anyone.”
Have you ever uttered these words? If you have, you’re one of millions who has harbored a secret.

PostSecret. In 2004, Frank Warren of Germantown, Maryland had an idea to start a community art project. He handed out self-addressed postcards in Washington, D.C.  that invited people to create an artistic work that shared a regret, fear, betrayal, desire, confession, or childhood humiliation. They could reveal anything, as long as it was true and it had never been shared with anyone before. These secrets were to be mailed to Frank anonymously.

Postcards started coming in, but to Frank’s surprise, the idea caught fire. He was astonished by the deep secrets many shared. Some were funny, some were heartbreaking. All showed the contents of people’s hearts.

The postcards just kept coming. Frank’s project grew into a worldwide phenomenon that has become known as “PostSecret.” In the last seven years, Frank has been sent over half a million postcards, hearing the secret desires or pains of strangers - enough to fill five books. In 2005, Frank began scanning the postcards and displaying them on a blog, which was updated with 10 new secrets every Sunday. In 2007, the PostSecret Community was born, and 80,000 users have registered for the online discussion forum.  In 2008, PostSecret teamed up with 1-800-SUICIDE to answer some of the numerous cries for help that the organization sees every single day.

Warren now weekly tours college campuses across the nation to speak about the secrets in today’s society (bringing with him a showcase of thousands of the postcards he has received over the years). At the end of each speaking engagement, Frank invites members of the audience to come to the stage and share a secret, right then and there.

What is the reason for PostSecret’s success? What makes people want open their hearts and minds to strangers in a public forum? This organization, though it is secular, has stumbled upon a concept that Christians have long known: secrets bind us, and humans are crying out for relief.

Why do we keep secrets?  There can be many reasons, and Satan loves to use all of them. He speaks to us in our pride, appealing to our deep need for acceptance and personal affirmation. We have all heard him whisper, “If anyone knew what you were really like, you would be despised.”

Or maybe Satan makes us think we can’t stop, or that we don’t have to. That we can continue in our anger, or in our sin, and are justified. Or that no one will get hurt.

Maybe Satan plays into our self-pity, and encourages us to feel sorry for ourselves. We carry deep hurts that wound us, and when we don’t release them, we make excuses, viewing ourselves as a victim. We do anything to stay in control of our own lives, since others have taken so much from us.

Or maybe Satan makes us doubt that the struggle can ever really be overcome. We become paralyzed, feeling that we’ve tried everything, and we resign ourselves to living with this problem. So we stick it in a closet in our hearts and close the door.

Our secrets will eat us aive. For whatever reason we keep our secrets, one thing is sure: a secret is like a black mold that can darken your heart forever. Aaron Stern writes, “Secrets never shrink, they never go away, and they never lead to life. …We may think we are keeping a secret, but the secret is actually keeping us.” You see, this is why God is against sin: not because He doesn’t want us to enjoy pleasure, but because He knows sin changes us, and the damage can be permanent (James 1:13-15).

For example, our anger can fester into a heart that is bent by bitterness.  And our sin can shape our minds so that all we can see is shame. We become two halves of a person: one half that is trying to prove that everything is fine, and one half that is filled with pain, anger, doubt, loneliness, and fear. So we learn not to trust, thinking it will protect our fragile hearts from future pains. We become isolated, and we are restless.

Behind the lies. Even Frank Warren, who is not a Christian, has learned that keeping secrets doesn’t keep us safe. He says, “I believe that the motives for mailing in secrets are complex. Maybe someone wants to share a funny experience. Other postcards show painstaking detail and raw personal insight. I think of each work as a piece of art, but I also see some as sacred objects used by the creators to find peace or greater self-acceptance.”

My friends, this is of God. Even those in the world know the truth in their hearts: there is a certain peace in confession. We can finally allow those two halves of ourselves to reconcile. But God goes a step farther: He promises us that if we surrender our dark places to him, we will be made clean.

“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9).

Frank also noticed something else: both the author of the secret and those who read it were empowered. And a surprising thing happens: “Our secrets… forge deeper channels of intimacy with each other.”

God promises the opposite of what Satan says: We are safe not in the secret-keeping, but in the secret-telling. When we keep secrets, Satan isolates us from the community, blocking us from opportunities for encouragement, affirmation, and love (the very same things we so desperately seek). But when we freely confess our sin or our hurt, we are not using the community, but creating it, both with others and with God.

How do we do it? We must begin by changing our mindset: we have to humble ourselves. We must be able to see a clear picture of who we really are, warts and all. Start by naming the problem. What is that thing that keeps you from living in complete freedom in Christ? You probably have a good idea of it already. It’s scary to acknowledge it, because that means admitting that you don’t have it all figured out, or that you have some real issues that need addressing. But once you name it, you’ll probably see that your fear of the thing was worse than the thing itself.

And there is more: our weaknesses are actually the places God works best. Paul describes humans as “jars of clay,” something very plain and ordinary. Your secret pains and struggles are like cracks and holes in that jar. But what happens when you put a candle inside it? The light is only seen through those holes. And Paul writes,

“But He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong” (2 Corinthians 12:9-10).

Don’t you love the word “sufficient”? It means that He’s all we need. We can stop trying to be something we’re not. And He will rest His power on us – the same power that raised Christ from the dead!!

So we take that weakness and, through prayer, put it into the light. Tell it to others who will pray with us and hold us accountable. Expose the filth, and get it cleaned up (Psalm 51:7). We lay our secret at the feet of the cross, and do not take it up again.

What happens after confession? Beautiful things. Read this passage from John 3:

“This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but men loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that his deeds will be exposed. But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what he has done has been done through God (John 3:19-21). “

God gets glorified. When we stop living by hate, fear, and pride, our minds can be ruled by truth. And we, who are small and broken, become a light, too. Our confession makes others stop and think, “God is powerful!”

In Mere Christianity, CS Lewis writes, “The point is, [God] wants you to know Him: wants to give you Himself. And He and you are two things of such a kind that if you really get into any kind of touch with Him, you will, in fact, be humble – delightedly humble, feeling the infinite relief of having for once got rid of all the silly nonsense about your own dignity which has made you restless and unhappy all your life.”

So, let’s stop resisting His call on our hearts. Let God have all that ugly mess that you don’t want to carry anyway. Confess your secret to Him. He already knows it.  And when we are weak, He is strong!

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart (Hebrews 12:1-3).”

Bicky Tolar

Abilene, Texas

Theme: Humility

“WHAT CAUSES FIGHTS AND QUARRELS AMONG YOU…?” James 4:1

“GOD OPPOSES THE PROUD BUT GIVES GRACE TO THE HUMBLE…” James 4:6

Why does James describe the tongue as “untamed” and “a world of evil” in Chapter 3, and preface his call for humility in Chapter 4 with warnings against fighting, quarreling, and envy?  

Is pride really as bad as coveting worldly pleasures enough to kill for them?  Based on James 4:2, the answer is yes, but how does this all fit together?  Intrigued, I did a key-word study of James 4 and made a sobering discovery.

  

“RESIST THE DEVIL AND HE WILL FLEE FROM YOU” James 4:7.

One of my favorite sayings is, “Live life in such a way that when your feet hit the floor in the morning the devil says, ‘Oh, no, she’s awake!”  Wouldn’t it be great to live such Godly lives that the devil would flee from us forever?  Unfortunately, Luke 4:13 says, “When the devil had finished all this tempting [of Jesus], he left him until an opportune time.”  If Satan watched for opportune times to tempt Jesus, imagine what easy prey he considers us to be.

Word Study (from Vine’s Complete Expository Dictionary):     

Proud [Gr. huperephanos] – showing oneself above others; preeminent (always negative).

Humble [Gr. tapeinos] – of low degree; brought low (always positive).

Devil [Gr. diabolos] – an accuser, a slanderer; from diaballo, meaning to malign; “A malignant enemy of God.”

When we fight and quarrel, envy and covet, accuse, slander, and malign others – either to elevate ourselves or simply in the course of mindless chatter – we give Satan (the malignant enemy of God) another opportunity to insinuate himself into our hearts, homes, churches, schools and workplace.

James 4:10 says, “Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will LIFT you up [hupsoo], meaning to exalt. When we humble ourselves before God, He is our cheerleader; our loving and omnipotent exalter.   We have no reason to elevate ourselves, especially at the expense of others.

Father, if only we could undo the pain our pride has caused others, and the damage it’s done your kingdom. We beg forgiveness and thank you for defeating Satan and claiming us for your own.  Amen.   

Sandra Milholland

Abilene, Texas

Theme: Humility

Humility

A Contradiction in Terms!

Who thinks of Paul, the Apostle, as humble?  I always think of him as outspoken, assertive, boisterous, a little abrasive, possibly overbearing. Aren’t those all adjectives that evoke the opposite of humility?  Paul, however, refers to himself in Acts 20:19 as acting humbly, 

 ¹⁸And when they came to him, he said to them:  "You yourselves know how I lived among you the whole time from the first day that I set foot in Asia, ¹⁹ serving the Lord with all humility and with tears and with trials that happened to me through the plots of the Jews; ²⁰how I did not shrink from declaring to you anything that was profitable, and teaching you in public and from house to house.”

A Bible dictionary defines humility as “an attitude of lowliness and obedience, grounded in the recognition of one’s status before God as his creatures.”  Using that definition, I agree that Paul was humble, before God (perhaps not before men). 

Webster’s dictionary defines humility as one who is “not proud or haughty, not arrogant or assertive, of low rank in a hierarchy, insignificant and unpretentious”.  Paul does not seem to fit anywhere into that definition of humility.  The word humble is derived from the Latin “humilis”, meaning low; and humus, or earth, meaning “on the ground”.

Aren’t many great historical leaders referred to as humble people?  Abraham Lincoln was considered a very humble man, but he was also a leader of our country during the very challenging War Between the States.  Similarly, Dwight D Eisenhower was considered humble, although he was an effective US Army General and later the President of the United States.

People who are humble may be very effective leaders because they lead by example and are not vain or self-consumed. Humble people avoid bragging and boasting thus making other people more comfortable in their presence. Humble leaders inspire loyalty in others because they understand that they are not effective without the help of others working with them.

Jesus was a humble servant.  We should follow his example.

Dear Lord:  Help me to be a humble servant and example for others.

Sherilyn Svien

Stephenville, TX