Measuring Our Lives

I’m currently enrolled in a study of conflict resolution and we recently were required to watch “A Civil Action” starring John Travolta as an ambulance chasing attorney about a big case he takes on that goes awry.  In the end, one of the characters is sitting before a bankruptcy judge and she is asking where all the assets went.  After a moment of nonresponse, the judge says something like “where are all your possessions, you know, the things we measure our life’s efforts by?”  OUCH!

Conflict is pervasive for many people and dealing with conflict can become a heavy burden.  To make conflict easier, some choose alcohol or drugs or sex or the act of accumulation.  Buying more, having more and looking better off than the next person becomes an obsession.  I have been a person who has been known to ease the pain of conflict with a nice gift for myself and yet the conflict remains, the gift deteriorates and what do I really have left to measure my life?  

I’m working on a new measurement system.  It’s a little more subjective than buying a 55” ultra-thin plasma TV but I believe it is something that will last longer and end up creating a picture much more beautiful and alive than that big TV.  I am trying to measure my life by the amount of love I can share.  A thoughtful word, a note in the mail, an offer to pray for someone, a lunch, being present when hard times come and offering a hand when help is needed.  

Here’s an illustration I’ve used in classes and writings I have done in the past, maybe here, but one that for me is worthy of repeating because it reminds me of how I want to measure myself and be measured...

Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. - ! John 4:8

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.  Love never fails. - ! Corinthians 13:4-8a

God is love so I can take “love” and the references to love in that passage and replace them with “God” and I should get an idea of the nature of God.  

God is patient, God is kind. God does not envy, God does not boast, God is not proud. God does not dishonor others, God is not self-seeking, God is not easily angered, God keeps no record of wrongs. God does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. God always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.  God never fails.

Now, let’s go a step further.  We are called to show the love of God to those around us.  So, I can take “God” out of the passage and put in my name and get a picture of what people should see in my nature.

Jeff is patient, Jeff is kind. Jeff does not envy, Jeff does not boast, Jeff is not proud. Jeff does not dishonor others, Jeff is not self-seeking, Jeff is not easily angered, Jeff keeps no record of wrongs. Jeff does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. Jeff always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.  Jeff never fails.

Try it out for yourself and see how it fits.  If you are like me, you’ll go through that exercise and think “wow, I’ve got some work to do.”  I don’t know that anyone will ever say I never failed (and I don’t even want to begin to discuss the easily angered part) but if I try to live up to what that passage says with my name in it, my life is and will be something worth measuring.  

I hope when my days are done, people will look back at my life and measure it with one word - love.

Jeff Jones

Decatur, Texas