Modesty

I have been recently conflicted about a Bible verse. I discovered the bead stores in Stephenville when my daughter, Kim, said “Come make a necklace with me at the bead store”. I don’t have many creative bones in my body, but I was willing to try. We each made a necklace; Kim’s was very pretty.  Her comment about mine was, it was very “Mom-like”.  I have improved since that first effort and now I really enjoy “bead therapy”, making whimsical necklaces as gifts for friends and family.  Now for the conflict:

   

 1 Peter 3:3-4   NIV

3 Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. 4 Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. 

I was hoping the verse I remembered prohibiting “putting on of gold jewelry” was in the Old Testament and had been made irrelevant by the new law. No such luck.

Is Peter telling us we should not wear jewelry; we should not braid our hair?  I am of the generation that did not wear makeup, jewelry, or nice clothes.  In high school I was most comfortable wearing patched old blue jeans and plaid flannel shirts. I didn’t wear jewelry anyway, so it was never a concern or an issue. When Doug and I got married, we were youngsters in college with part-time jobs. We didn’t spend money on things like fine clothes or jewelry.  It was simple to comply with Peter’s guidance to let your “adorning be the …imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit”. Now, I am older with more wrinkles and laugh lines. Jewelry is designed to attract attention and deflect notice from other areas.

Peter is not prohibiting wearing jewelry, braiding hair, and wearing fine clothes.  He is suggesting that women should not become obsessed with worldly things. Women should win their husbands to Christ with a gentle and quiet spirit, inner beauty. The current U.S. society is as obsessed with physical beauty as the ancient Greek society.  Too many girls are having cosmetic surgery to change their bodies and attract male attention.  The clothing I see young women and wives wear is much more provocative than it should be. The immodest clothing generally attracts the wrong type of attention, anyway. Women of faith should only consider the attention of men who look at a woman’s heart and character. It is important to keep in mind marriage is a life commitment and your values will be passed to your children. I recently heard a quote that fits this discussion, “Don’t marry a man unless you would be proud to have a son exactly like him”.

When we were first married, my husband pointed out a blouse I was wearing was too low cut.  I would never have thought so, but since that was his opinion, it made an impression on me.  From that time to the current, I always consider whether the clothing I wear is modest enough for my husband’s judgment before I leave the house.  

I have adopted a more unconventional style of dress, recently. The new style is a little out of character for an accountant. I like the flowing skirts, shawls, scarves and layers of comfortable, light fabrics because they are reminiscent of my youth, and fun to wear with my newly created bead necklaces. Dare to be different!

Dear God, Please continue to walk with me each day. Help me to be a woman of gentle and quiet spirit. I want to be a respectable example to young wives and women, pleasing to you, and to my husband.

Sherilyn Svien

Stephenville, Texas

Jesus Waits for our Invitation

Luke 24:13-29 tells the story of 2 disciples leaving Jerusalem 3 days after the crucifixion of Jesus. They are 7 miles outside of Jerusalem walking down the road to Emmaus discussing everything that has happened. They encounter a man on the road, who appears to have no knowledge of the events. They share everything they had witnessed.  Then this same man tells them that they are slow of heart to believe and shares every prophecy that was ever made regarding Jesus.  Soon after, they reach the village and the man acted as though He were going farther. But they urged Him, saying, “Stay with us...”

If you know this story, you know the man was Jesus himself. The men were kept from recognizing him.  In this story, Jesus had risen from the grave earlier that day and yet he does not force himself on anyone. He lays out the truth before the men and keeps walking. He leaves them with a choice and this day they choose Him. They urge him to come to their home.

I recently read the book, “Tortured for Christ” by Richard Wurmbrand. He tells of preaching the good news of Jesus in communist countries. One story he told, not of torture, but of a man’s conversion touched my heart and made me think. The man’s name is Piotr (Peter) and he was 20 when he heard the story of Jesus. Piotr had grown up under communist rule. He had been told what to like, what to dislike, what to do and what to believe. There had been no choice in his first 20 years of life. Upon his conversion, he was asked what verse in the Bible most influenced him to come to Christ. He said, “Luke 24:28 because, as the two disciples drew near to the village, He[Jesus]indicated that He would have gone farther”. Piotr said, “ Jesus is polite. He wished to be very sure that He was desired. When He saw that He was welcomed, He gladly entered the house with them. In contrast, the communists are impolite. They enter by violence into our hearts and minds. They force us to listen to them from morning to late in the night. They do it with our schools, radio, newspapers, posters, movies and atheistic meetings with godless propaganda everywhere we turn. Jesus respects our freedom. He gently knocks at the door of our heart.”

After Piotrs’ conversion he repeatedly risked life and liberty to smuggle Christian literature in for the underground church. His brothers and sisters witnessed so much evil from Satan through communistic brainwashing and torture of their friends and family they vowed not to let Satan enter even 1% of their heart. They are completely devoted to Christ.  

In our neighborhoods, in America, with much freedom and the ability to worship without being arrested, we must not take this freedom for granted. There is a war between Jesus and Satan. Let’s join our persecuted brethren and stand up for Jesus, always.

Rev 3: 20 “Behold, I stand at the door and knock: if anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and will dine with him, and he with Me.”

Terry Smith
Stephenville, TX

Mother's Day in 3D

“  An excellent wife who can find?
    She is far more precious than jewels.
   The heart of her husband trusts in her,
    and he will have no lack of gain.
   She does him good, and not harm,
    all the days of her life.

   Strength and dignity are her clothing,
    and she laughs at the time to come.
   She opens her mouth with wisdom,
    and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
   She looks well to the ways of her household
    and does not eat the bread of idleness.
   Her children rise up and call her blessed;
    her husband also, and he praises her” – Proverbs 31:10-12, 25-28

Before I was a Mom -
I slept as late as I wanted and never worried about how late I got into bed. I brushed my hair and my teeth everyday.

Before I was a Mom -
I cleaned my house each day. I never tripped over toys or forgot words to a lullaby. I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous. I never thought about immunizations.

Before I was a Mom -
I had never been puked on - Pooped on - Spit on - Chewed on, or Peed on. I had complete control of my mind and My thoughts. I slept all night.

Before I was a Mom -
I never held down a screaming child so that doctors could do tests...or give shots. I never looked into teary eyes and cried. I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin. I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.

Before I was a Mom -
I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put it down. I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn't stop the hurt. I never knew that something so small could affect my life
so much. I never knew that I could love someone so much. I never knew I would love being a Mom.

Before I was a Mom -
I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body. I didn't know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby. I didn't know that bond between a mother and her child. I didn't know that something so small could make me feel so important.

Before I was a Mom -
I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay. I had never known the warmth, the joy, the love, the heartache, The wonderment or the satisfaction of being a Mom. I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much before I was a Mom.  

--Selected

Hope in Christ

"Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.” Psalm 42:11

Hard times have not only shaken my hope, but they’ve allowed me to see I often misplace my hope. Sometimes, I experience disappointment because I have put my hope in material things, in money, a job and even in success.  But the apostle Paul had a different claim, “Hope in Christ does not disappoint.”  That’s good advice from a man who had many reasons to despair throughout his life. He often found himself hungry, naked, shipwrecked, beaten and imprisoned. Instead of losing all hope, Paul preached to his soul, like the Psalmist did in the verse above. They both chose to put hope in God alone. No matter the outcome, Paul was not disappointed.

In our lives, we may lose hope, but the God of all hope has not lost us. That’s when it’s especially important to cling tightly to the truth of 2 Corinthians 4:8, “We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair.”  

While trouble may surround us, we are not alone. When we feel hedged in by doubt, we can remember we have a Helper, who is our great support. God is our hope. We don’t have to be perplexed, uncertain or concerned about our future. He has promised to deliver us.

We experience deliverance from hopelessness by remembering Christ’s counsel. “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world” (John 16:33). Jesus is saying that financial trouble will come, health will falter, children may rebel, and loved ones will die … but He has overcome it all. Christ is bigger than any trouble you and I face.

I am learning to give up the illusion of a trouble-free life. In this fallen world, it’s just not possible. Desiring a life unmarked by pain and problems is misplaced hope. God never promised we’d be happy and healthy. No. He promised if we would trust Him in the midst of adverse circumstances, we would not be disappointed. That, my friends, is a hope we can hold on to.Dear Lord, I’m finished and done with putting my hope in people, things, and position. Today, I’m putting my hope in You alone. Even if my circumstances don’t change, I will trust You to fill me with Your peace and provide the strength I need to make it. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
Casey Dacus
Graham, TX

Measuring Our Lives

I’m currently enrolled in a study of conflict resolution and we recently were required to watch “A Civil Action” starring John Travolta as an ambulance chasing attorney about a big case he takes on that goes awry.  In the end, one of the characters is sitting before a bankruptcy judge and she is asking where all the assets went.  After a moment of nonresponse, the judge says something like “where are all your possessions, you know, the things we measure our life’s efforts by?”  OUCH!

Conflict is pervasive for many people and dealing with conflict can become a heavy burden.  To make conflict easier, some choose alcohol or drugs or sex or the act of accumulation.  Buying more, having more and looking better off than the next person becomes an obsession.  I have been a person who has been known to ease the pain of conflict with a nice gift for myself and yet the conflict remains, the gift deteriorates and what do I really have left to measure my life?  

I’m working on a new measurement system.  It’s a little more subjective than buying a 55” ultra-thin plasma TV but I believe it is something that will last longer and end up creating a picture much more beautiful and alive than that big TV.  I am trying to measure my life by the amount of love I can share.  A thoughtful word, a note in the mail, an offer to pray for someone, a lunch, being present when hard times come and offering a hand when help is needed.  

Here’s an illustration I’ve used in classes and writings I have done in the past, maybe here, but one that for me is worthy of repeating because it reminds me of how I want to measure myself and be measured...

Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. - ! John 4:8

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.  Love never fails. - ! Corinthians 13:4-8a

God is love so I can take “love” and the references to love in that passage and replace them with “God” and I should get an idea of the nature of God.  

God is patient, God is kind. God does not envy, God does not boast, God is not proud. God does not dishonor others, God is not self-seeking, God is not easily angered, God keeps no record of wrongs. God does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. God always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.  God never fails.

Now, let’s go a step further.  We are called to show the love of God to those around us.  So, I can take “God” out of the passage and put in my name and get a picture of what people should see in my nature.

Jeff is patient, Jeff is kind. Jeff does not envy, Jeff does not boast, Jeff is not proud. Jeff does not dishonor others, Jeff is not self-seeking, Jeff is not easily angered, Jeff keeps no record of wrongs. Jeff does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. Jeff always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.  Jeff never fails.

Try it out for yourself and see how it fits.  If you are like me, you’ll go through that exercise and think “wow, I’ve got some work to do.”  I don’t know that anyone will ever say I never failed (and I don’t even want to begin to discuss the easily angered part) but if I try to live up to what that passage says with my name in it, my life is and will be something worth measuring.  

I hope when my days are done, people will look back at my life and measure it with one word - love.

Jeff Jones

Decatur, Texas

Let's Be Friends

Last week I once again realized the importance of friends.  True friends.  Friends that speak truth to your soul, call you closer to God, and remind you of heaven.  The Apostle Paul calls them, “dear friends”… Anne of Green Gables, “kindred spirits”.  When we have an encounter with a friend like this, it truly is the Spirit that is kindled.  I’m not talking about the friends you call when you want to go see the latest movie or chat on Facebook.  I mean fellowship of the soul. 

We all need fellowship on this level.  Although not always easy to find, when we get the opportunity we can and should be ready to open our hearts.  Many times I can fall prey to self-preservation, busy-ness, or allow myself to be too distracted to take hold of these precious moments.  My air of “I-have-it-all-together-and-don’t-need-anyone’s-help, thank-you-very-much,” can make me seem unapproach- able. I can also become pacified with surface level relationships, because deep ones take time, vulnerability and purposeful-ness.   However, when we make the effort and allow God to provide these opportunities for our souls to rub up against another’s, our hearts will be blessed. 

Proverbs 27:9
Perfume and incense bring joy to the heart, and the pleasantness of a friend springs from their heartfelt advice. 

In John chapter 15, Jesus tells us how deep friendship should look, act and feel:  Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends (John 15:13).

It is through the laying down of our lives, and our expectations that we can be Jesus to one another and love like he loves.  He tells his disciples that he no longer calls them servants, but rather friends because he has shared all that the Father has shared with him.  Jesus shared his heart, unashamedly and without regret.  He chose to minister to a lost world through a group of friends.  He could have used, and still could for that matter, many other means of reaching the world, but he chooses people.  He chooses you.   He chooses friendship.    

Philippians 2:1-3
So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus,... 

Dear Lord, thank you for moments in time when we connect with friends in deep and meaningful ways.  Thank you for putting people in our path that can speak words of conviction, encouragement, and love to our hearts.  Help us to be a friend to others like Jesus was…help us to need and want friends like Jesus.  Forgive us for times when we try to self-sustain.  Let us not be afraid of open, honest, vulnerability.  We love you and thank you for loving us.  Amen. 

Dana Jaworski
Anchor Point, AK

Out of the Darkness . . .

I just read my dad’s article from yesterday. Naturally, it made me think about “stories” I’ve heard recently. One stands out above the rest. I have a friend who I’ve known for a long time. We went to elementary school together when my family lived in Abilene when I was very young, and didn’t meet again until I came to ACU four years ago.

Our friendship has encountered many challenges, but has managed to endure in the midst of these, largely due to his honesty. As we’ve walked life together, he has confessed to anger, lust, porn addiction, objectifying women as a result of that addiction, turning his back on God, among other things. In the past year, we’ve grown apart a bit and I missed out on about nine months of his life. Three weeks ago, he called me and said he needed to talk. I knew it must be serious, since we had not spoken a word to each other in months.

We met at the park and he wasted no time. “Erin,” he said, “I need to confess something to you. I know we haven’t talked in awhile, but I’ve felt comfortable with confessing things to you in the past, so here it goes: I’m addicted to weed and prescription meds. For the past five months, I’ve been selling drugs, stealing money from my parents, and am constantly “on” something. I’m high all the time. Last night, something inside me broke. I can’t do it anymore. I want to change and I can’t do it alone. I understand if you can’t look at me the same way. I understand if you don’t want to be my friend anymore. But I can’t go on living with this sin inside of myself.”

He shook with silent sobs. I can’t begin to imagine the fear that he felt in that moment--fear of being given up on, fear of an angry response, fear of being told that there was no love left for him. Contrary to his expectation, I have never loved him more than I did in that moment.

Why is confession so hard? It requires vulnerability and honesty, and, perhaps more difficult, it requires the acknowledgement that there is a need for change in our lives. A generalized confession on a notecard after the invitation song doesn’t cut it. Even confessing to God alone doesn’t either. In confessing to one another, we hold each other accountable. We call each other out of the darkness of secret sin and walk with each other in the light. We give those who love us the opportunity to prove the depth and endurance of their love for us. We connect in community the way that Christ has called us to. Confession creates stronger community.

Bringing sin into the light strips Satan of his power over that realm of our lives. The Lord knows every part of us, yes, but the Lord still longs to be invited into our hidden places. In doing this, we invite Him to teach us how to know Him more, and to know ourselves, as well. His appearance in these times is as sure as the dawn.

“Come, let us return to the Lord.

For He has torn us,
and He will heal us;

He has wounded us,

and He will bind up our wounds.
He will revive us after two days,

and on the third day He will raise us up

so we can live in His presence.
Let us strive to know the Lord.
His appearance is as sure as the dawn.

He will come to us like the rain,

like the spring showers that water the land.”
Hosea 6:1-3

Erin E. Daugherty, Abilene Christian University