Don't Let it Change You

Been stung lately?
Not by a bee or a scorpion.  
The human variety.  The sting of rudeness, slander, anger, maliciousness.  The sting of such things can poison our hearts and change our spirits...if we let it.  

The story is told of an old man who liked to meditate every morning under the shade of a big tree on the bank of the Ganges River.  One day, after he'd completed his morning ritual, he noticed a scorpion tangled in the tree roots at the water's edge.  As the scorpion struggled to free itself, the current from the river threatened to submerge the helpless animal.  

The old man crawled out on the roots of the tree and reached over to save the scorpion from drowning.  For all of his effort, the old man was rewarded with a sting from the distressed creature.  The old man recoiled in pain, but soon gained his composure and again extended his hand to save the scorpion.  And this went on for some time until the old man's hands were swollen with the venom from the scorpion.  

A passer-by shouted to the old man: "Are you crazy?  Why do you want to save such a vile creature that is so intent upon harming you?"  

"It is the scorpion's nature to sting," said the old man, "but why should that change my nature to help?"  

Listen to the wisdom in the streets.  Take to heart what television programs and movies tell us about "revenge."  Linger in just about any break room in any office complex and listen in on the daily chatter.   The word is out:  Let the stingers beware!  The cliche' "it's a dog-eat-dog world" begins to make sense when we absence the gospel and the Lordship of Christ.  

Jesus' actions at the cross are necessary for our salvation.  His words at the cross show us what it means to live nobly as people of the gospel in a world that gets out of bed with their stingers on guard!  With ignorance, hate and malice standing before his pain-racked body he said, "Father, forgive them for they don't know what they are doing" (Luke 24:34).   Paul said, "Bless those who persecute you, bless and curse not....Never pay back evil for evil to anyone" (Romans 12:14, 17)  

Our commitment to non-retaliation is a moral thing with us, but when viewed in the practical experience of everyday life the implication is much bigger.  It shows "stingers" the dignity, power and beauty we are capable of as human beings when the Spirit of Christ rules in our hearts.    

Father, give us such a heart.  We are susceptible to the poison of hate, malice and revenge.  The stings we experience can send this poison coursing through our veins.  We are tempted to hear only:  "it's your right" - destroy!  Save us from such thoughts and their progression into action.  Bathe our hearts with your grace and a greater sense of our calling to be the presence of Christ in those moments when we hurt so bad.  Give us the continual ministry of your Spirit so that we can live beyond the seductive reach of our own sense of justice and injustice.  And, may we genuinely seek out how we can do good even to those who sting us.  Because of Jesus....Amen.

Randy Daugherty
Stephenville, Texas

Grumbling....Guilty as Charged!

Phil 2: 14-19 reads:
Do everything without grumbling or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, "children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation." Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky as you hold firmly to the word of life. And then I will be able to boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor in vain.  But even if I am being poured out like a drink offering on the sacrifice and service coming from your faith, I am glad and rejoice with all of you.  So you too should be glad and rejoice with me.  

Isn't it interesting how the Spirit works on us when we need a little honing?  Recently, I read the passage above and even though I've read it many times before, this time it hit me like ton of bricks. At that very moment I was convicted by Paul's writing.  I too needed the same reminder that the church in Phillipi needed.

Too often I let myself grumble and argue. Most often it's about little insignificant things. Nonetheless, I waste time and energy by allowing myself to get caught in the mix when I should have a positive attitude and choose to let it go. I dont always have to agree nor do I have to like certain situations, but if it's not in my power to change it and if it won't have a negative consequence then I shouldn't grumble about it.   The time I waste grumbling should be spent on something positive and productive working in our Father's kingdom. I should choose to rejoice and be joyful in all situations just as Paul instructs.

Perhaps you find yourself with this same habit? Thankfully, we have a loving Father that forgives us of all our shortcomings and has promised to take care of us in every possible way. What more do we need? 

Father, forgive me for squandering time grumbling and arguing about insignificant things. Please help me to choose to be positive and joyful. Thank you for your unending care and love.
In Jesus' name, amen.

Michelle Tittor
Grapevine TX

Heal Our Brokenness

I am a Registered Nurse and I work at a Wound Care Center. We take care of chronic wounds.  You might ask, what is a chronic wound?  It is a wound that has not shown the ability to heal over a two week period or longer. Some people come to us who have had a wound present for months, or even years. The longer the wound has been present the longer it takes to heal. Usually the body has accepted the wound as normal and the healing process has shut down. These wounds may not be very large, but they cause daily discomfort and disrupt the patient’s life.

The first thing the doctor will do to stimulate healing is to debride the wound, removing the dead tissue. The patient’s body realizes something has changed and that signals the release of an entire cascade of healing properties. Many people ask, “Can’t you just sew it up?” The answer is no. The tissues in a chronic wound will not “knit” together as they do when the wound is only hours old.  When a wound has been open for days, weeks or months it must heal from the inside out. The body will generate new tissue in the base and once that tissue has built up to skin level, the top layer of skin will grow across and close the wound. This process will only occur with adequate blood flow, absence of infection and the proper bandage.

“O Lord my God, I called to you for help and you healed me.” – Psalm 30:2

“He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” – Psalm 147:3

Spiritually, many of us walk around with chronic wounds. We have hurts and disappointments that plague us daily.  Although well intentioned, our “home remedies” can’t provide the desired healing.  For example, we may decide to ignore the wound and assume it will go away.  The spiritual wound becomes deeper and disrupts our daily walk with God and others.

Obedience to the scripture, “Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry” (Ephesians 4:26), is much like going to the ER and getting stitches right away for quick healing.  When we don’t obey the scriptures, we allow our hearts to become infected with bitterness, envy, anger or jealousy.  Our hearts become similar to a chronic wound.  The only way we will heal is to ask for God’s help. We must allow God to cut away all the bitterness and resentment that has become attached to our heart. God will heal us from the inside out.  Just as a wound must have good blood flow to have a chance to heal, we must give ourselves to prayer to overcome sin’s deceitfulness. We do not expect a chronic wound to heal when it is simply left open to air. Likewise, we can’t expect our heart to heal if we leave it unprotected and open to Satan’s attacks. God’s holy word is the best protective bandage to be applied to our heart.

Is it time to heal a chronic wound in your heart? Make an appointment with the “Great Physician”.

Dear Father, come into our hearts and heal our brokenness.  We surrender ourselves to you and we place our hearts before you to cut away all those things that do not reflect your Spirit. We want to experience being alive in Christ and know the fullness of your love.  In the name of Jesus, Amen.

Terry Smith

Stephenville, Texas

My Words, Too, Lord

As wildfires continue to devour thousands upon thousands of Texas land, wildlife, livestock and even human  life, many have suffered tremendous loss. Father, protect and strengthen the firefighters who labor to extinguish the fires.  Comfort and strengthen those who have suffered loss.  Please send rain on our land.

I’m reminded of the convicting truth from James 3:  

5So also the tongue is a small part of the body, and yet it boasts of great things. See how great a forest is set aflame by such a small fire!

6And the tongue is a fire, the very world of iniquity; the tongue is set among our members as that which defiles the entire body, and sets on fire the course of our life, and is set on fire by hell.

7For every species of beasts and birds, of reptiles and creatures of the sea, is tamed and has been tamed by the human race.

8But no one can tame the tongue; it is a restless evil and full of deadly poison.

9With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the likeness of God;

10from the same mouth come both blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not to be this way.

It only takes a spark to begin a forest fire.  The tongue is such a small part of the body, but is capable of horrific power and devastation.  Just yesterday, I spoke words unbecoming for a Christian, at the time it seemed only harmless humor.  As the hours passed and my mind pondered the words, my heart became heavy with shame for careless words spoken.

How quickly our words can spread flames that may incinerate the landscape of our relationships.  The damage is done.  Unlike a wildfire, the prairie or field often return greener and cleaner.  But, the destruction of careless words can cause pain over and over again-spoken only once. Restoration may be possible through humility, forgiveness, love and grace.

Fire also enhances our lives through warmth on a cold winter night, or cooking the meal enjoyed around a campfire. Similarly, our tongues can and should be instruments of instruction and inspiration, encouragement and edification.  Words, I believe, are directly connected to the condition of the heart.  May our words be in worship and praise of our LORD and an inspiration to those around us.  

Most Gracious Heavenly Father, bathe my heart and mouth in Your love and grace.  For in the moments I speak careless or hurtful words, Your Spirit is not reigning in my heart.  Help me

 in this weakness.  May confession be my desire when I do fail to rein in my words and motives.  Mold me into a quiet spirit full of Your love.  May the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be pleasing to You, O God.  Thank You, Father, for the gift of Jesus.  In His name, Amen.

Mischelle Oliver

Stephenville, Texas

The Downward Spiral

Series: Battles of the Heart

Nails painted black
tilt her hat seductively
towards a flawless nose.
Bottles clink and chime
as she impulsively,
compulsively,
treacherously
drinks and drinks.
Bruises line the green and purple veins
that are the latitude and longitude lines
of her snowy white arms,
mapping out her existence
and appearing as deadly
as the coordinates of the
Bermuda Triangle.
She gulps down contempt
and shoots up apathy.
She spits out bitterness
with every word she speaks
because her mind is full of it.
Her eyes drink it in,
not willingly, as some,
but because other options
are cruelly elusive.
And when her cold eyes
stare at the mirror,
she sees a fusion
of her mother and dad,
older sister and cousin,
fourth-grade softball coach,
boyfriend from freshman year.
And she stares in the mirror
and sees them swirl in a downward spiral,
colors morphing and merging,
twirling towards her pupils
that are as black as
self-loathing.

I wrote that poem. Writing it was a transcendent experience--one of those things that just flowed from my pen and, when I went back and read it, that is what it said. Which means that every word of it came straight from my subconscious and that which is buried deep within my heart.

I’m not that girl, but there are aspects of her that I see when I look in the mirror. There are images from my past that haunt me, not necessarily things that I’ve done, but things that I’ve experienced. Some of these experiences were a result of the way I felt like I was treated by the church, by those who scorn the church, and the person who I chose to be.

Sometimes, though I’ve escaped the situations that produced these memories, they still affect how I handle things now, how I react to simple comments, how I view the church, how I respond to anger and fear, and how I view my worth as a human being. It began as hurt, then slowly morphed into anger and resentment, then transformed into bitterness.

The hurt turned into anger because I didn’t let the wounds heal. I let them fester, so I felt a sting each time the wounds were reopened by a thoughtless remark, snide comment, or malicious intention. I was too young to understand how I should go about allowing these wounds to air out and heal, so I hid them. I found no place for release and grew weary of nursing old wounds, so I chose an alternate emotion to replace the redundancy of the pain. Anger.

The anger turned into bitterness because I bottled it up. I felt angry at the people who hurt me, my family, or other people who I loved, and I hid the anger from everyone. I didn’t feel like it was an appropriate emotion to express. Anger seems so rash, illogical, and unrighteous, so I kept it inside. The churning of my stomach, the dizziness in my head, and the aching of my heart made me realize that anger was not an emotion that I could maintain and act out of for long. Because I chose to repress it, it changed into yet another, and more deadly, emotion. Bitterness.

Sound familiar? Or maybe it doesn’t. I view bitterness as the aftermath of something. Some people may not realize that bitterness comes from a thing of the past, from another emotion, or from, simply, the way that life has progressed. Some people don’t recognize bitterness at all. It is one of Satan’s greatest ploys because it is, often, unrecognizable.

Even more dangerously, it can be something that we desperately want to hold onto, for fear of giving it up and allowing healing to begin. Sometimes, I want to dwell in my bitterness because it is familiar. It is a feeling that I have known for years. I know how to function in the midst of bitterness. I’m well-practiced. But functioning from a place of wholeness? That is something that I haven’t known how to do for a long time.

Coming out of bitterness is uncomfortable. I haven’t even quite figured out the proper way to do it. I am getting to the point where I allow myself to express hurt and anger and work through it as it comes, instead of stuffing it deeper into myself and saving it for later. When I recognize it in its beginning stages--hurt, anger, fear, insecurities, injustice, etc.--it is easier to prevent bitterness from ensuing at all. See the girl in the poem? She sees her past when she looks in the mirror. And she views it from the perspective of one who has chosen to loathe herself as a result. Bitterness skews the way that we perceive the world. When I know my perspective is skewed, I turn to prayer, the Word, confession, or even moments of release in which I rage and cry and scream. Allowing myself to acknowledge the incongruity of my perspective helps me to see where it needs to change.

The book of Hebrews says, “Pursue peace with everyone, and holiness--without it no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no root of bitterness springs up, causing trouble and by it, defiling many” (Hebrews 12:14-15). When our vision is marred by bitterness, we cannot see the Lord. When we are bitter, we lack peace. When we are bitter, we are not whole. When we dwell in bitterness, we reject the grace that God offers. Knowing that His grace is sufficient, it is my desire to dwell in that and to leave bitterness behind.

Father,
Though healing often hurts, teach us to choose this healthy pain over the pain of all-encompassing bitterness. Speak truth to our hearts, reminding us that your grace is sufficient and that because You offer it freely, we are not slaves to our own bitterness. Thank you for being our Healer. We love you and thank you for the ways that we can learn and grow, even in the midst of internal struggle.
Amen

Erin Daugherty
Abilene Christian University

Traveling Light

Series: Battles of the Heart

I think it was Woodie Guthrie who strummed these words several years back:
I’ve been walking that Lincoln Highway
I thought you knowed,
I’ve been hitting that 66,
Way down the road,
Got a heavy load, I got a worried mind,
I’m looking for a woman that’s hard to find,
And I’ve been doing some hard traveling, Lord.

Some songs are more than “tunes”. The lyrics come from the forge of somebody’s life. I guess that's why some songs attach to our minds so strongly. They tell "our story" too.

Ever read Psalm 42? The writer (probably David) has a heavy heart. He throws open the curtains and lets us peer into his pain. He compares his life to that of a deer that has reached the point of exhaustion. He is faint and desperately in need of cool water. As you read the psalm it is clear that he describing more than the proverbially “bad day”. He is in a phase, a funk, a long stretch of road that has disrupted his life in some pretty major ways. His worship is off center. But he wants to stay true to want he knows about God. He isn’t ready to abandon ship. In fact he wills his mind to reach out for the knowledge of God’s power and majesty that has, over time and because of hardship, moved to the recesses of thought. And yet, it is these great thoughts that keep the thread of meaning sewn into the broken pieces of his spirit. He eventually steals away by himself and sits in nature and just listens. Deep calls to deep, he says. It’s more than soft breezes, the sound of water falls, squirrels chirping and clouds floating along. He hears the voice of God in the created order. The beauty and majesty of it all anchors his restless heart to the bedrock of faith. Although enemies hound him and people capitalize on his vulnerability, he continues to reach out for God. On the other end of what had to be a much longer experience than the length of the psalm indicates, he says:
Why are you cast down, O my soul,
And why are you in turmoil within me?
Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,
My salvation and my God.

Some time ago I sat and reflected on things I have heard people say over the past year.
I just want to feel something good. I haven’t felt anything good in months.
I wish I had something to look forward to.
I am so bored right now.
Bitterness has become a way of life for me.
I hate my life.
All I do these days is worry.
I can’t remember the last time I smiled because I felt like it.
My involvement in church – if you can call it that – has been basically just showing up.
I crawl to church.
I feel like I’m invisible. I feel like I’m at the bottom of a old water well. I scream for help but
no one can hear me.
The best part of my life is when I go to sleep.
The smallest thing can trigger my anger. My anger takes me out to the darkest places of thought – to places that I used to never think about. I live with a quiet rage.

There’s a lot of heaviness in our world. Like Guthrie says, we do some hard traveling. That’s why I like Psalm 42. It’s so real. It’s us. It’s life in 3D. We know what it’s like to feel the tension between what we know about God and what is happening to us in real time. We, too, pant for flowing streams and want to know…God! You still there? And yet, this psalm annoys us because it doesn’t say “add water and stir”. Holding it together “in faith” is hard work. We pant, cry, wait, agonize, and quite frankly sometimes wonder if our lives are about to fall apart. Worship gets stale. And, the heaviness we feel is beyond “take two aspirin and call me in the morning.”

Is your heart embattled right now? Is your spirit heavy? I like verse 4: These things I remember as I pour out my soul... I am thankful for the psalmist’s transparency. I continue to be refreshed by his authenticity and his willingness to pour it all out before the Lord. The old tongue and cheek "rub some dirt on it...pull yourself up by your boot straps" doesn't work so great when we find ourselves on one of those rocky stretches of road. It is in those moments that it's great to know songs like Psalm 42. It can soothe and minister to our restless hearts because we know we’re reading words that were forged in somebody’s life who finished the journey.

Gracious Father, you are the only one who can refresh our hearts. Lift the heaviness from our lives and refresh our spirits with the assurance of your presence and care for us. When we feel the weight of life pressing the joy and strength of faith from our lives, help us to know the journey that is Psalm 42. Help us to know its winding road and the good place that it can take us. We ask this through the One who has walked the road ahead of us…Amen.

Randy Daugherty
Stephenville, Texas

Unflinching Kindness

Series: Battles of the Heart

How many different ways do our hearts become embattled on a daily basis? Too many to count, more than likely. When I think of a battlefield, I think of a violent, busy place. Coincidentally, that happens to be a pretty accurate description of an average day in my life. From the instant my feet hit the ground in the morning to the moment my head hits the pillow at night, I find myself in the midst of a violent, busy world that seeks to find ways to break my will and my spirit. We can all sympathize with this description, I suspect. The demands that our family, job(s), hobbies, & a myriad of other sources place on us can really put us at the center of a spiritual, emotional, & physical tug of war.

Specifically, I find myself occasionally pondering the intelligence of displaying and demonstrating kindness to the violent busyness of this world. Does it make sense to return handshakes to those who would fire flaming arrows? Is it wise or prudent to sidestep a sword swipe and then offer a smile or gentle nod of the head to the person wielding the sword? And is it pure insanity to repeatedly take blows to the body and head, only to offer forgiveness and a warm hug in return?
While these questions are not meant to be taken literally, they are proffered as assistance in addressing an issue that Christians today deal with constantly. How can we continue to be kind to a world that will not reciprocate? But is that really the issue with which we should be concerned? I feel that a deeper theological question might be, “Why do we need to be kind to a world that will not reciprocate?”

The importance of bearing the spiritual fruit of kindness is overwhelmingly apparent as one studies the New Testament. Being called to be an ambassador of Christ includes “clothing” ourselves in Him (2 Corinthians 5:20). Literally, Christians are to be a representative of Christ to those who either don’t know Him or at best don’t have that good of a relationship with Him.
One of the most basic ways that Christians can have an impact on those individuals that we meet in our violent, busy lives is in our personal interactions with them. We have to show kindness because Christ would show kindness. We have to show love because Christ would show love. As His representatives, it is our responsibility to take Him to all those that we meet. How better to do that than to replicate his treatment of individuals in interpersonal relationships?

Christ loved everyone! He demonstrated kindness, love, & mercy to all that He met! His presence on this earth was multi-faceted; including but not limited to – providing all that he met with the opportunity to worship God (the woman subject to bleeding, etc), & fulfilling God’s plan of salvation for us. Now that He is no longer here with us, the accuracy with which we represent Him to all that we meet is of paramount importance.

I must admit that I fail everyday, and I do not pretend to possess any magic bullets/potions/chants that will improve the quality of your walk with Christ. My life as a Christian is in a constant state of flux, and I am always reminded that I am indeed in the midst of a battlefield (whether I acknowledge it or not). However, my life has been noticeably blessed when I make a continued effort to bring the kindness of Christ to a world that does not expect or solicit it. It is my prayer that our tribe will be known as a kind group of people, just as Christ was known for his kindness to those who least expected or “deserved” it.

Blake Williams

Stephenville, Texas

A Trampled Heart

Series: Battles of the Heart

How do you feel when you have been mistreated? I recently read the biographical book Unbroken by Laura Hillenbrand (Random House, 2010). It is a WWII story of survival, resilience and redemption. The main character is Louis Zamperini, an Army Air Force bombardier and Olympic runner. He ran a 4:14 mile, barefoot on the ocean sand, but rather than train and perform in the Olympics he was called to serve in a war. One fateful day his B-24 went down in the Pacific Ocean. After days of survival on the ocean, he was picked up by the Japanese. He then survived three tortuous years in several Japanese POW camps with the fiercest of all war criminals, Watanabe Mutsuhiro. Louis endured unspeakable humiliation, dehumanization, starvation and torture at the hands of Watanabe.

When the war was over, Louis was rescued to return home, reliving the torture daily in flashbacks and dreams. He was consumed by the idea of saving enough money to fly to Japan to confront his attacker. When he was no longer able to cope with the memories he resorted to drinking. The drinking became so controlling, that his life was falling apart. One day, someone very close to him invited him to hear the story of Jesus. He initially resisted, but eventually listened and learned of the life of Jesus. He became a believer and his life was transformed. He let Jesus take control, letting go of the fear and hatred he had for Watanabe. He could now sleep peacefully. He never drank another drink. It took years, but he saved the money to return to Japan and find Watanabe and tell him he forgave him. What mercy!

Do you realize that you receive peace when you give mercy? God will bless your obedience. He asks us to have mercy on others, because he knows of the influence we will have and the peace he will provide. Paul said, “Forgive as the Lord forgave you” (Colossians 3:12-14). Jesus said, “I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you” (Matthew 5:43-45).

Reflect on Jesus’ merciful reaction as he was spat upon, tortured and humiliated. How can we withhold mercy to others? We can’t! Jesus said, “Pray for those who mistreat you” (Luke 6:28). We must call upon God to help us show mercy… even when our heart has been trampled.

Our Father God, forgive us for withholding our mercy toward others. Transform our hearts, so that your love and mercy take control. In the name of Jesus, Amen.

Terry Smith
Stephenville, Texas

On My Key Chain

Series: Battles of the Heart

Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me - John 14:1-2

In April of 2010, while my husband was abroad helping to construct a new Christian broadcast station I lost a baby at four months. In his efforts to come home early, the volcano eruptions in Iceland halted air traffic all over the globe. As his original departure date neared, government issues in Madagascar again delayed his arrival by another two days.

Thankfully during this time my boys and I were in Texas with the support of our family. I had previously lost loved ones to old age, cancer and heart disease, however the loss of our unborn child affected me more deeply than I felt my faith could handle. I couldn’t understand how or why our little one needed to go home before ever arriving; especially when we were working for God. It was in this grief that my heart experienced its deepest anger. During the weeks awaiting my husband’s return I allowed Satan to feed this anger. Almost undetectable at first, the Deceiver subtlety planted seeds of doubt, fear and hurt. Instead of taking these questions and thoughts before the Lord, I felt justified in turning away from prayer and the solace of God’s word. I didn’t even realize how angry I had grown until my husband’s return and suggestion of prayer together. I had come to the point where I was comfortable with my anger and wasn’t ready to let it go.

Over the next months I held fast to 1 John 3:20, “For if our heart condemns us, God is greater than our heart, and knows all things.” I openly confessed the sins of my heart and asked God to forgive my resentment. It didn’t work at first. I tried again and again. Over time God’s patience eroded my anger.

But Satan wasn’t done with me yet. Soon after Christmas, our family lost one of our closest friends in a car wreck. More than just a friend, this vibrant mentor was an adopted grandmother to our family who found themselves a long way from our home in West Texas. Cathy’s loss was hard, but finding out that her loss was due to the irresponsible actions of someone else…now that was just too much to handle.

Just like the disciples, with a troubled heart I too have wondered, “Why now, Lord?” (John 13-15). The answer is the same for us as it is for Jesus’ disciples, “Trust in God; trust also in me.” No matter the challenge, tragedy, or blessing; God wants us to trust him. Trusting and believing that God’s plan is bigger than ours in the face of tough times is freeing and healing. He knows our hearts will be troubled, but He also knows the answer to our heart’s greatest need: Trust.

I have had a key chain for many years inscribed with the verse, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding,” found in Proverbs chapter 3. I now more eagerly read verse 8, “It will be healing to your flesh and refreshment to your bones.”

Lord, thank you for loving us even when we doubt and grow angry in our lack of understanding. Give us trusting hearts that see your eternal plan at work in our lives. Your strength and power in taking on our burdens and questions is mighty. We thank you for healing our hearts and refreshing our bones when we grow weak.

Dana Jaworski
Anchorage, Alaska

Feeling Guilty

Series: Battles of the Heart

…let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water… (Hebrews 10:22)

During the first few months of life our hearts hum a simple tune. When we’re comfortable we coo, when we’re uncomfortable we cry, and when we don’t know what we are – just feel out of sorts -- we fret while we make up our minds.

One sign of maturity is learning how to bring harmony to a cacophony of conflicting emotions. For example, we love our spouse, we love banana pudding, we love it when driver and golf ball meet at the “sweet spot,” and we love it when a plan comes together.

We sometimes look and sound angry when we actually feel vulnerable, frustrated, sad, embarrassed, afraid… In the heat of the moment it’s easier to pitch an angry fit than to figure out what’s really going on with us.

Different feelings call for different choices. What’s this got to do with feeling guilty? Our conscience (Greek noun suneidesis) is what discerns good from evil so we can do what’s good and avoid evil.

What do you feel guilty about? I feel guilty when I relax….when I say no….when I eat sweets…let my children struggle…spend money on myself…missing church when I’m sick…

We beat ourselves up feeling guilty. We pray for wisdom to make choices that please God, then thank him by “feeling guilty” when we don’t meet human expectations. I feel very frustrated about that!

Wisdom finally said, “Sandra, what does God’s word say about feeling guilty?”
I delved into my trusty Vine’s Dictionary of Biblical Words, [Vine’s and Mounce’s] Complete Expository Dictionary of Old and New Testament Words, Westminster Dictionary of Theological Terms, and NIV Study Bible to see exactly what I should and should not feel guilty about.

I’m not a Greek student but I can snoop out sufficiently enough to be dangerous. Feeling guilty wasn’t in there!

Let’s call it what it is. We can feel uncomfortable or unsettled about earthly matters, but where eternal matters are concerned “feeling guilty” has no place in the life of a Christian. That’s very good news (Romans 5:6; 6:8; I Peter 3:18; I Corinthians 6:11).

Father God, thank you for your gift of grace that gives us peace, comfort and joy in the chaos of life. Through Jesus whose sacrifice ensured it, amen.

Sandra Milholland
Abilene, Texas

What, Me Worry?

Series: Battles of the Heart


I can remember seeing Mad Magazine when I was in High School. Alfred E Neuman, the grinning, freckled cover boy’s slogan was “What, Me Worry?” He never looked very worried, despite impending disasters. Who would have thought that Mad Magazine would promote the Biblical principle described by Jesus in Matthew 6:25-27 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?

I know people who are immobilized by worry. It is frustrating to watch helplessly as a loved one becomes frantic with worry over things that will probably never occur; a plane crashing, possible loss of a job, and other “negative fantasy” situations. There is no point in worrying about the future because worry almost never helps a situation and it ruins the present. Excessive worry can trigger a panic attack and is counterproductive, even destructive. Worry creates a battle of the heart.

What can be done? Try to convert destructive worrying into productive planning. There may be solutions for the worrisome issues. Itemize a list of the things you worry about, an attempt to make them less troublesome. Try to be more realistic about the future. Think about something other than the source of the worry. Pray!

I don’t worry about much. I do pray a lot. I pray for my family and friends. I pray for troublesome situations to be resolved. I pray for healing of bodies and hearts. Prayer is very calming when there is a new worrisome battle at work on my heart. God’s love and power are sufficient for the day. I want to depend on God to fight my battles for me.

Dear God, Please provide the assurance only you have the power to give, to win battles of the heart that are focused on worry!

Sherilyn Svien
Stephenville, Texas