Remember the Garden!

Jesus spoke in parables.  He used simple stories.  I marvel at how he took something as magnificent as "the kingdom of God or kingdom of heaven" and set it within the simple framework of everyday life experiences.  

Have you read any parables lately?  

The parable about the wheat and the tares has always been an interesting story to me.  It is in some respects annoying to many Christians.  Diagnostics and healthy discernment notwithstanding, Christians and churches alike can grow anxious over any number of things within and without the kingdom of God.  We grow impatient and allow our anxiety to walk us headlong into a chronic state of panic over a vast array of things that can result in staying the Holy Spirit's work in our midst.  We spend our days ruminating about everything that is wrong, or about to be wrong, in the world and in the church.  To borrow from a farmer friend, "You can get so busy with the weeds that you forget there is a garden in the middle of it!"

Do you remember what Jesus said about this in the “parable of the field” recorded in Matthew 13:24-30, 37-43?

24 He put another parable before them, saying, “The kingdom of heaven may be compared to a man who sowed good seed in his field, 25 but while his men were sleeping, his enemy came and sowed weeds among the wheat and went away. 26 So when the plants came up and bore grain, then the weeds appeared also. 27 And the servants of the master of the house came and said to him, ‘Master, did you not sow good seed in your field? How then does it have weeds?’ 28 He said to them, ‘An enemy has done this.’ So the servants said to him, ‘Then do you want us to go and gather them?’ 29 But he said, ‘No, lest in gathering the weeds you root up the wheat along with them. 30 Let both grow together until the harvest, and at harvest time I will tell the reapers, Gather the weeds first and bind them in bundles to be burned, but gather the wheat into my barn.’”

Later Jesus has to explain the parable to his disciples.  Here is what he said:

“The one who sows the good seed is the Son of Man. 38 The field is the world, and the good seed is the sons of the kingdom. The weeds are the sons of the evil one, 39 and the enemy who sowed them is the devil. The harvest is the end of the age, and the reapers are angels. 40 Just as the weeds are gathered and burned with fire, so will it be at the end of the age. 41 The Son of Man will send his angels, and they will gather out of his kingdom all causes of sin and all law-breakers, 42 and throw them into the fiery furnace. In that place there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth. 43 Then the righteous will shine like the sun in the kingdom of their Father. He who has ears, let him hear.

By the time Matthew's readers received this parabolic reminder, 30 years of preaching, ministry and church history water had gone under the proverbial bridge.  Most of the book of Acts has happened and then some.  In other words, a lot of living, struggle, and suffering.  House churches were in duress. people who were once faithful weren't around anymore.  "Progress" wasn't a word peopled used then.  (Should we use it today?)  They wrestled with big questions:  Is this worth it?  Is suffering going to worsen?  Do we need to make the gospel more adaptive to culture?  In short, they were getting anxious.  And, this parable was a reminder to them to stick to their guns and, in a word, continue being who Christ had called them to be.  Just be wheat! Just keep bearing fruit!

Like I said, this parable is annoying.  It is annoying because it doesn't explain everything about life and ministry that we want to know.  Nor does it give us a magic wand to fix every problem in the world or in the body of Christ.  What it does give us is some much needed perspective on what we need to focus on every day, namely, being disciples. 

We can get so lost in analyzing the darkness that we forget the wisdom in the song "This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine."  And shining is the best thing any of us can do!  Weeds of every kind are going to grow. Jesus said so. But, so does the seed of the kingdom!  Planting, watering, and tending the field is the best thing we can do every day.  As the song says, "This is my Father's world!"  Have a great day in the garden!

Randy Daugherty

Stephenville, Texas

When you Drop the "Dis"

I’m a word nerd. Claimin’ it.

I love new words, old words, fun words, big words. I love to make up words, too.

At my house, it seems that if you add the -age ending to a word, it makes it a little more genteel in nature, perhaps more polite in conversation.  “My chestage is so sore from that workout yesterday!” See? You can totally bring that up at your husband’s fancy office dinner. Or not.

The point remains: I love words.

So it was that my thoughts drifted while taking notes in Bible study. I was initially trying to decipher how to spell the word “disappointment” while the instructor was illustrating that disappointment may lead us to God’s biggest work in our lives yet.

Dis – of course that prefix means not, opposite of, away from.  Appointment — hmmm.. a role, task, assignment.  Whether or not we can spell it, the weight of the word itself brings about heaviness of heart and soul, filling the eyes with tears. We all know that disappointment feels far more heavy than a clinical discussion of the word.

You know disappointment first-hand, no doubt. The job, the child, the home, the spouse, the life you were counting on in some regard didn’t happen. And your heart was broken.

The last year has been a series of disappointments for our family. A job loss for my husband was unexpected. A new job then required a move for our family, which our teens let us know wasn’t in their life plan. Now the new location and cost of living has me sending out resume’s and applying for jobs only to hear again and again, “No thank you, you aren’t quite right..” or to be told nothing at all.

Faith is leaning into the word itself and hearing Him whisper: “See? Child, I’m telling you. This isn’t your appointment. This isn’t what I have for you. I have so much more for you. Dry your eyes. Dust yourself off. Move on.”

Is it possible that God can use my disappointment to move me to a Divine Appointment in my life?

Consider some heroes in the faith from scripture:
– Hannah, disappointed every month when she still was unable to have a child. Finally, finally… God blessed her with Samuel. Samuel that she gave back to God and who spoke for him.

– Ruth, widowed and alone, found her kinsmen-redeemer, and ended up giving birth to Obed. She has a spot in the lineage of Christ now.

– Sarah, my own namesake. Her disappointment at watching the calendar flip year after year with no children led her to desperation. She eventually would be redeemed, known as “Mother of many.”

The sting of my job rejection disappointments may subside as I journey deeper in with the Lord seeking my divine appointment. I’m trusting I’ll know it when I see it.

The boxes are mostly unpacked in our new home as the kids are making friends at school, and we are blessed to be employed again. (What is the grace period for living with boxes in your house after you’ve moved? I’m pretty sure I’m pushing it…)

The hurt of the disappointments is healing while I seek time with the Lord. My faith can be a shaky seedling some days, but I am hopeful that I will grow into His divine appointment for me.

Sarah Stirman

By His Power, For His Glory

It seems when I am striving my hardest to live Christ-minded and share with others, my adversary, Satan, afflicts me with a thorn in my flesh.  As I mature, only through and by the grace of God, I have come to realize that Satan’s desperate attempts to make us stumble by pressure, discouragement, distress, and persecution are deliberately timed.  

Whenever we have sin in our lives, Satan will pounce on the opportunity to turn a possible sin like fear or anger into greater evil. His purpose is to make it as difficult as possible for you and I to reach out to others in a Christ-like manner.  What better time to challenge us than when we are facing our own struggles.  

God tells us that our troubles are meant to show His glory which molds us into the likeness of Christ as a direct result of ministering to the lives and needs of others during our own sufferings just like our brother, Paul.  In Corinthians, Paul shares ways to change our discouragement into peace and joy.  “There was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me three times.  I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”  Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.  That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties.  For when I am weak, then I am strong. (II Cor. 12: 7-10)

If we proclaim to have faith in God then why is it so difficult for us to demonstrate faith during our most vulnerable times? Why do we tend to rely on earthly resources before putting our reliance in a God that is so great that He surpasses all knowledge… a God with infinite attributes who allows us to draw on his resources?

Everyone can look back in the past or possibly the present to a time when you didn’t know how you were going to feed your family their next meal, pay the rent or electricity, buy your children shoes, pay medical bills, etc., but yet somehow your needs were met.

I Kings 17 is an example of how Elijah demonstrated his faith and put complete reliance in the Lord and he was fed by the ravens or the poor widow at Zarephath that was preparing her last meal for she and her son. By faith she was blessed by relying on the word of God and never ran out of food. Yet, like some of us, it was not enough. When her son became ill and died, she questioned God as to why she was being punished for her past sins.  It took another miracle of raising her son from dead for her to have complete faith in God.

God works through our weaknesses (II Cor. 11:28 - 12:6) and strengthens us when we are weak and tired. (I Cor. 1: 8, 9) He provides us not with weapons of the world, but weapons of divine power to demolish strongholds. (II Cor. 10:4) We are not alone in facing our troubles. God is faithful. He has proved that over and over in the bible and in our lives.

The resurrection of Jesus Christ gives us hope through our struggles each and every day.  Everything we do by His Power and for His Glory will last to eternity.  Commit to being preoccupied with being holy in all matters of life and demonstrating your faith by total reliance in God.

For this reason, I kneel before the Father. I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. To Him be the glory forever and ever! Amen.

Carla Henson

Tuscola, Texas

The Right Words

I just don’t want to pack my bags and head out the door. I typically jump at a chance to head SOUTH and see the family, but this time my purpose is to travel home, be with family and attend the funeral of a 21 month old baby boy. A terminal illness is the culprit, his 21 months were hard ones and my heart ached for him and his family as they dealt with his sufferings.

Is it better for his little body to be amongst the angels, YES.
Was it hard on the family to deal with a son, nephew, cousin and grandson losing his battle….Absolutely.
So as I pack my bag, what words do I use when I see them?
"Sorry, know how you feel…"  (NO)
"So sorry for your loss…" (Yes, but so standard)

I needed some connection with words as I prepared to head home. I have tossed around thoughts, statements and scriptures as I have talked with my sister in law, who is the aunt, during this entire battle. So I began packing for my trip, stuffing the bags, hanging the dresses out to be packed, and my phone goes off…. a new email!

I have a best friend that sends a scripture out every day. I usually read quickly, smile, and then say a prayer of thanks that I have a friend that makes me pause to think about our heavenly Father… then go about my day. But yesterday’s scripture was perfect, it was exactly what I needed to prepare for my trip home. It got me out of my funeral funk, and I will continue to pray that those are the words I can use over the weekend.

Romans 5:1-5
  Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ.
  Through him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the   glory of God. More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.

After I read that email, I paused and thought about it. Smiled and thanked GOD again for my daily scripture!

Sometimes the direction in which we are led is not fun and may be confusing. In those moments we have to choose to see the will of God and realize JD was sent for us all to realize a bigger picture. It was for us to grow in character because of him, and his strength. It was for us to acknowledge that the hard and painful sufferings he and his family faced will allow endurance to be produced. That’s a good thing!  Endurance produces character, character produce hope. Hope is what we can hold onto so that our goal is to reunite with all those who pass before us in Heaven!!!!

This Southern Girl will be on her way home, shortly. My bags are packed and the car will soon be loaded.  I know there will soon be some porch swing time with hurting family members trying to find the silver lining in this experience. I pray that endurance, character and hope is the blessing they each find through this. I would like to end with a special request… would you please offer a special prayer for my sister in law, Alleasha, and the Ferron family as we honor JD Ferron, their Superman, who died of Menkes Disease.

Heavenly Father,
I humbly come before you thanking you for the life, health and blessings we receive daily.
I thank you for placing people in my life that help me with my heavenly walk. I ask that you embrace the Ferron family as they all come together to honor a family member. Please allow everyone to see your love and let it flow into their hearts. Be with all those who have lost family members or who are in a battle now. Thank you for choosing to send your son, to die on the cross, so that the hope of heaven is here for us all.
In Your Son’s name I pray,
Amen  

Ashleigh Feuerbacher
Stephenville, Texas

Dancing with Fear

People have an affinity with fear. It’s a tricky dance we do, fear and us. Fear almost always gets to lead because we don’t like to fight her for the lead on something so complicated. She guides our steps, directs us into intricate spins, presses us close to her so that she can whisper sweet nothings in our ears.   Her whisperings are much more than “nothings,” however. They’re more than we want to hear, more than we want to ponder, and they add an unnecessary tension to decision-making. Her voice decides where we will go, what we will do, and how we will do it. Her voice is so forceful. We let it force us right into emptiness.

And maybe we don’t even realize that we’re acting out of fear. It can be deeply entrenched in other things, so deeply entrenched that we can’t even pick it out of a crowd of emotions and thoughts . . .
I’m afraid to pursue a career that evokes all my passion because I might not make that much money.
I’m afraid to give up [insert addiction here] because living without it might be hard.
I’m afraid to apologize because it might be rejected.
I’m afraid to share the gospel because it might not be accepted.
I’m afraid to love people unconditionally because they might not love me back.
I’m afraid to ask questions in my faith because I might not find answers that I like.
I’m afraid to delve deeper into the Word because it might call me to a higher standard than I’ve previously pursued.
I’m afraid to give away the things that I have to people who need them more than I do because I might live a little less comfortably as a result.

. . . But I’d rather not settle for dwelling in the conditional nature of that which comes after the “mights.” Living life running from the “mights” isn’t living life at all. It’s hiding from life. If you really hate this life and if you’re really discontented, maybe you need to check out your motives for doing the things that you do. If the reasoning behind them is because the alternative has more risk involved, then no wonder you’re unhappy. The joy of investing in an experience that is inherently good should outweigh your fear of possible consequences.

Fear is the absence of faith. Last time I checked, we’re called to faith, not fear. Acting out of fear is about the same as assuming that God’s power cannot transcend human weakness. God has worked (and continues to work) through some seriously weak people.

Own up to your fears and weaknesses and let the Lord work through them. We have nothing to boast in apart from God’s grace. That’s freeing. I’m not obligated to create situations that allow me to boast in myself. Anything I could create will eventually turn to dust anyway. I’m letting God create the situations and I’ll bring my weak self to them. Anything glorious that comes from my involvement in said situations is by the grace of God. That’s something to boast about.

“God has chosen the world’s insignificant and despised things--the things viewed as nothing-- so He might bring to nothing the things that are viewed as something, so that no one can boast in His presence. But from Him you are in Christ Jesus, who for us became wisdom from God, as well as righteousness, sanctification, and redemption, in order that, as it is written: The one who boasts, must boast in the Lord.”
I Corinthians 1:28-31

Amen.

Erin E. Daugherty, Abilene Christian University

Just Ask

What in your life provides satisfaction, joy, and true meaning?  There is a void within us that must be filled, and whether we realize it or not we search desperately to fill it.   We bury ourselves in our work or our families, in sports, in politics, in humanitarian efforts, or causes.  We pursue religion and works thinking it is the answer.  We seek recognition, wealth, or power attempting to satisfy the desire inside of us.  Most of our pursuits are not bad and result in many good things, yet we are not satisfied.  There is something missing.  We want something full, and rich, and satisfying.  In our youth we search asking “what will I do with my life”, in our middle age we doubt asking “what am I doing with my life” and in our late years we look back and wonder “what did I do with my life”.   No matter where you are, if you have not found what you need to fill the void, allow yourself the freedom to hear a pure, simple promise. 

“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.” Matthew 7:7-8

 “I am the door, and the person who enters through me will be saved and will be able to come in and go out and find pasture.  A thief comes to steal and kill and destroy, but I came to give life—life in all its fullness.” John 10:9-10

Jesus is that “something” we all seek.  He is the passageway to life; and not just any life, but life in all its fullness.  His offer is rich and full and satisfying.  He says I am the door that when opened and walked through provides all that you could ever want or imagine. 

Take notice of a few things.  The promise is bed-rock solid and there for us, but we must understand Jesus is the only way.   There is only one door to life.   We must ask to find this door and we must seek the door.   This is our choice and it is a daily choice.  Notice and be warned that there is a thief who will come to steal our hearts and minds away.  The thief, Satan will do all in his power to divert us.  We are easy prey to wealth, troubles, and the day to day worries of this life.   To be warned is to be armed. The battle is worth it.  Take heart from the promise of God that if we seek Him we will find Him.  If we seek Him first everything else we worry about will be taken care of.  He promises us that.  We must fight our stubborn and fearful hearts.  Accept that the Lord is good and that life will be found in Him and Him alone. 

Taste and see that the LORD is good; blessed is the one who takes refuge in him. Fear the LORD, you his holy people, for those who fear him lack nothing.  The lions may grow weak and hungry, but those who seek the LORD lack no good thing.  Psalm 34:8-11

Father open my eyes to see You and Your salvation.  Guide me in paths of righteousness.  Deliver me from evil.  Thank you for Your promises.  Amen

Scotty Elston
Shallowater, Texas

Materialism is Harmful for Marriages

God’s wisdom is, once again, supported by man’s discovery.  According to a recent Brigham Young University news release, scholars at BYU studied 1,734 married couples across the country.  Each couple completed a relationship evaluation, part of which asked how much they value “having money and lots of things.”  The researchers’ statistical analysis showed that couples who say money is not important to them score about 10 to 15 percent better on marriage stability and other measures of relationship quality than couples where one or both are materialistic.  “Couples where both spouses are materialistic were worse off on nearly every measure we looked at,” said Jason Carroll, a BYU professor of family life and lead author of the study.  He continues, “There is a pervasive pattern in the data of eroding communication, poor conflict resolution and low responsiveness to each other.  How these couples perceive their finances seems to be more important to their marital health than their actual financial situation.”

Godliness with contentment is great gain.  For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it.  But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that.  People who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge men into ruin and destruction.  For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil.  Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs. (1 Timothy 6:6-10)

Paul’s inspired advice on the subject of materialism is quite to the point: a materialistic mindset will cause negative results in your life.  A materialistic person has an undo regard for worldly concerns.  This person is focused on short-term satisfaction and achievements, while neglecting long-term fulfillment.  The materialistic person is thinking physically, not spiritually.

When materialistic priorities find fertile ground they take root.  Unfortunately, as the Lord warned us, materialistic roots will bear evil fruits.  Goals and plans and expectations will all be influenced by the insatiable desire for “more.”  Enough is never enough.  The evil root of loving money can cause undesirable conditions, such as: overextended debt obligations, neglected or injured relationships, anxiety-induced health issues, and wandering faith.  Interestingly, according to an ABC News review of the survey, “The correlation between materialism and marital difficulties remained stable regardless of the actual wealth of the couple…  it (the survey) may simply mean that people who are more focused on making money have less energy and interest left to invest in their marriages.”  Once again, it is not the possession of money that is causing the problems.  It is the love of money, materialism, which is a root of all kinds of evil.

Focusing on godliness and being content will achieve true long-term fulfillment and satisfaction.  The contented person is satisfied.  He is not chasing after “more.”  Are your physical needs being met?  Great, that should be enough.  You arrived with nothing, you’ll leave with nothing.  Don’t buy into the materialistic mantra, “What have you done for me lately?”  The spiritual mind is mature and aware of the temptations and traps that grow out of an evil root.  

Carl  Smith
Stephenville, Texas

Nate the Great

“You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world.”  1 John 4:4

Someone once told me that a good question to ask yourself when you are going through tough times is, “What does God want me to learn from this situation…or how can I draw nearer to God through this…?”  Lately, I have been blessed with some challenging events that caused me to ask those very questions.  

This summer our 2 ½ year old, Nate broke his leg running down a hill at a friend’s house.  His legs got ahead of him and he slipped on the grass.  His body turned sideways and his downhill leg went out from under him, while the up-hill leg pronated inward and rotated.  The effect was a loud, sickening “pop” that resulted in all the parents present to run to his aid.  Later after some late night x-rays we found out that he had a double break with a spiral fracture of the left femur.  I was weeks away from delivering our third child and having nearly constant contractions.  

Nate was placed in a hip-spica cast, which runs the length of the broken leg, to the knee on the opposite leg, up to the middle of the chest and held together by a 1 inch dowel across his thighs.  He was in the cast for six weeks.  Three and half weeks into his casting I delivered our third child via c-section.   Thankfully, both of our moms came from Texas to help for nearly a month.  If they hadn’t come to Alaska, I might have been committed to the loony bin.

Three weeks “post-cast” Nate and I walked out to the storage cabin behind our house to retrieve some toys.  Nate had been walking about ten days and was still a little shaky.  He clung tightly to my hand as we painstakingly traversed the uneven, muddy ground.  Normally, our trek would have taken about ten minutes; this day it took a little under an hour.  As we slowly walked I admired the Alaskan fall beauty that surrounded us and tried not to cry over my son’s struggle.  His broken leg had healed nearly a half inch shorter and I wondered if his severe limp would ever go away.  My mind worried ahead to possible future athletic disappointments, lifelong physical pain, and social stigma.  As if he was reading my mind, Nate said, “Momma, I want to run.”

“Okay, let’s give it a try…” I replied uncertainly.

“Not yet, not today…I can’t…but I will run, momma.  I will,” he emphatically stated as he trudged ever so slowly onward.  

His “declaration of overcoming” hit me squarely between the eyes.  No matter the outcome of his accident, God was already training his heart and mine.  

The passage in John 4 encourages us to be aware of false prophesies, but can also stand as a reminder to be aware of Satan’s schemes.  He wants nothing more than for God’s children to worry about tomorrow and to doubt the power of Him who resides in us. Satan and his workers are also seeking to make us forget that God has already overcome our greatest problem (death) and through him WE are OVERCOMERS as well.   God is bigger than any problem we might face in this world, even the gut-wrenching, heart-rending pain of seeing your child suffer.  In fact, he understands better than anyone.

Dear God, thank you for being greater than all that stands against us.  You are the great overcomer, and we praise you for inviting us to do the same.

Dana Jaworski
Anchor Point, Alask

What is Your Suffering?

In my life I know a father abandoned by his wife and who lost his 2 young sons to illness, a wife married to and staying with an abusive husband for 40 years, and a woman devastated by physical ailments with a lifetime of surgeries and pain.  In moments of reflection on their lives I heard them say: “I wouldn’t change a thing”, “I wish everyone could have what I have”, and “My life is so good”.  Each endured suffering with unfathomable grief, inescapable despair, and unimaginable pain and yet they made these incredible statements.

From the perspective of the tragedies in the lives of these people their words did not reconcile with the reality of their sufferings.  I knew these were not flippant remarks to impress but were sincere expressions from the souls of believers.

I came across two scriptures that I read within the context of the lives of my friends who have suffered so much.

"But we must suffer as Christ suffered so that we will have glory as Christ has glory." Romans 8:17

So hold on through your sufferings, because they are like a father’s discipline.  We do not enjoy being disciplined.  It is painful, but later, after we have learned from it, we have peace, because we start living in the right way. Hebrews 12:7, 11.

I have gone through my own suffering since those of my friends.  I would not try to compare mine with theirs but I know mine was very painful.  Much comes to light in suffering.  Priorities are clearer and focus is keener.  The truths spoken by my friends became clear and I can now reconcile their words.  Only in suffering do I come to realize and understand the true brokenness of my life and how much I need my Father. Only suffering brings me to the feet of Jesus begging for His help, crying out to Him to save me from my pain and hopelessness. Only suffering allows me to be bare before Him with nothing offered, no ego, no solutions, no justifications, no rationalizations, only my cry for help to allow Him to save me. Until then I won't let Him in. I am too proud, too self reliant, too independent.  My Lord doesn't choose to make me suffer. That is not what He wants. But He knows it is the only way I will ever understand.  He knows it is the only way I will ever let Him save me and recognize it is His power, and see it for what it is.  When I have fallen at His feet and am laying before Him with no expectation the Spirit cries out to my Father for me knowing exactly what I need and He answers with a loving embrace of His presence. When you experience firsthand this relationship it is pure joy and you would never change it.  

That is what the father would not change. 
That is what the wife wished that all could have. 
That is what the woman proclaimed as so good.    

That is why they said what they said.

Thank you Father for always pursuing me. I want to taste true communion with You where there is true life and peace.  Lead me to that life however You need to.

Scotty Elston
Shallowater, Texas

Prayer VS Worry

It is inevitable that life is full of ups and downs. Some of these things are beyond our control and some, quite frankly, we create ourselves because we are people with clay feet. The problem that I have--and to which most of you can probably relate--is how I cope when they arise. My first instinct as a human being is to worry about the situation to bring about a resolution. I will confess I have spent an awful lot of time in my life worrying. I’ve worried about my job, my wife, my kids, approaching deadlines and shrinking budgets. I’ve worried about bills and expenses, rising gas prices, insurance costs and endless taxes. I’ve even worried about having my home in perfect condition for my family and company. With two little ones around and company that have kiddos, the house is turned upside down seconds upon their arrival and no one even notices.  

I’ve worried about first impressions, political correctness, terminal diseases, whether my house is going to sell or not and the list goes on. In spite of all this worrying I am still alive and well and bills are paid and life is good.

Over the span of my 32 years on this earth (yes, I know I am young and still have a lot to learn), worrying accounts for numerous hours of invaluable time that I will never get back. Over the past several months, I have been in constant conversations with my God and have made a conscious effort to spend my time more wisely and more enjoyably. Yeah, I know you are probably thinking, "Come on, Landon, I have heard this time after time and this is a Basic 101 concept, but how do I get to the root cause and stop actual worry?" By reading this far in this article if you’re not convinced yet to give up worrying (I know easier said, than done), here are some biblical reasons not to worry. This is the answer to the questions you have formulated in your head up to this point.

1.  Worrying accomplishes absolutely nothing.
If you are like me, I do not have time to waste these days and worrying is a waste of very precious time to solve a problem or bring about a solution. Why waste the time and effort? Matthew 6:27-29 asks if all your worries add a single moment to your life. And why worry about your clothing? Look at the lilies of the field and how they grow. They don’t make their clothing, yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are.

2.  Worrying is not good for you.
Worrying is destructive to us in more ways than one. It is mentally destructive. It can cause us to grow physically sick. Proverbs 12:25 says worry weighs a person down, but an encouraging word cheers a person up.

3.  Worrying is the opposite of trusting God.
The energy that we spend worrying can be put to much better use in prayer.
Philippians 4:6-7 reminds us not to worry about anything. Instead, we should pray about everything. Tell God what you need and thank Him for all He has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Jesus Christ.

4.  Worrying puts our focus in the wrong direction.
When we keep our focus on God, we know how much He loves us and we realize we truly have nothing to worry about. God has a plan for us and part of that plan is taking care of us. Even when difficult times arise and it seems God does not care, we put our heart and soul in His hands and focus on His kingdom. God will take care of our every need. Matthew 6:31-33 says we shouldn’t worry about such things as: 'What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?' These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but our heavenly Father already knows all our needs. Seek the kingdom of God above all else and live righteously, and He will give you everything you need. 1 Peter 5:7 says we should give all our worries and cares to God, for He cares about us.
Father, Give us the strength and wisdom to be conscious and put our total focus on you.  You loved us so much and care for us so dearly that you sent Jesus to die for us. Help us to be constantly reminded of that and strengthen our faith. We love you, in your precious name, Amen.

Landon Kribbs
Springtown, Texas

Calling on the Name of the Lord Sets Us Free

It was a hot day at Park Gardens Church of Christ in San Juan, Puerto Rico.  The louvered windows were open to their maximum angle and the metal blades of the ceiling fans overhead whirred at a rate that could have launched a single engine aircraft when I first heard the words of a song that forever changed my heart.  Jeff and I spent the first two years of our marriage in Puerto Rico.  His work took us into an adventure that would shape our young marriage and offer us a rich source of growth and perspective.   We were blessed to be a part of an English speaking, Caribbean congregation.  At first it was quite an adjustment being the only “specks of salt in a whole shaker of pepper”, but soon enough we grew to love and be loved by our brothers and sisters.  One of the many things we enjoyed about worshipping with the congregation was the singing.   

The song that had such great impact was an old spiritual, “By the Rivers of Babylon”.  It is actually a combination of Psalms 137 and 19 and is found in most song books as “Psalm 137”.  The words are as follows:
“By the rivers of Babylon…
where we sat down.
And there we wept,
as we remembered Zion.
O, the wicked!
Carried us away to captivity,
required from us a song.
How can we sing the Lord’s
song in a strange land?
So, let the words of our mouths
and the meditation of our hearts
be acceptable in thy sight, O Lord.”  

I myself have never felt the pain of physical enslavement or a lack of freedom to do as I will on a daily basis. The lyrics of the psalmist and the singing of my brothers and sisters conveyed a deep sadness, yet a longing to never forget the power of God or the freedom that comes through calling on his name.  Many of the congregants gathered that day were a generation or less away from enslavement themselves.  I grew teary-eyed at the realization that to many of them this song was both an anthem of freedom in Christ as well as freedom from slavery.  The passion that filled the congregation when we sang this hymn has stayed with my husband and me over 10 years later and is easily recalled when we sing it today. However, the message behind the passion seems to be needed in my life more today than ever before.  It is a call for God’s rescue and freedom.   

Much like the washing machine I seem to daily attend to, I can easily become caught in the spin cycle.  Living life in a reactionary mode and permitting the attitude of my heart to be affected by others and the circumstances around me can become a bad habit.  We all need God’s recue and freedom.  I start with good intentions, I want to help.  So I fix this, organize that, prepare another meal and comfort a friend.  But then the winds pick up and the waves get a little higher.  I fight back and paddle harder.   I teach the classes, and hold bible studies, and try to have all the answers when my family is in crises or when something else goes wrong.  The chaos builds and life is once again chaotic and overwhelming.  So I work harder, do more, and yet it seems that, all the things I’m doing for God seem to be going wrong!   And then I remember Gal 5:1, “It is for freedom that Christ has set you free.” 

What is that freedom?  As we open our hearts to the message of the savior, we come full circle to the idea of slavery.  Turns out we are human and despite our best efforts we will serve something.  Listen to what Paul teaches in Rom 6.  After laying out the simple message of the gospel (6:1-5); Paul goes on to simply say:  Who will you serve?  Verses 16 – 18 say:
“Don’t you know that when you offer yourselves to someone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one you obey—whether you are slaves to sin, which leads to death, or to obedience, which leads to righteousness? 17 But thanks be to God that, though you used to be slaves to sin, you have come to obey from your heart the pattern of teaching that has now claimed your allegiance. 18 You have been set free from sin and have become slaves to righteousness.”  

So how does the idea of freedom in Christ and being slaves to righteousness fit together?  Simply.  We all know that on our best day, when we think we are in control and everything is up to us, we mess it up.  It is when we give up control and give ourselves over to God’s love and direction that we are able to be free.  Let God be the provider, let God be the leader, let God be the forgiver, let God be the master, let God be the protector, let God be the healer.   He’s God, He can handle it.    

Prayer:  “Dear God, pierce my ear.  Give me the strength to let go.  Give me the strength to take hold of your freedom.”   

Dana and Jeff Jaworski
Anchor Point, AK

Wrestling

One of the strangest stories in Genesis is found in the thirty second chapter. Here, Jacob and God wrestle all night. What a struggle! What a night! This was no ordinary fight. Jacob’s goals and God’s were not the same. 

Imagine a Father wrestling on the floor with his children. What is going on in the father’s mind is very different from what the child is thinking. The child thinks he is winning. So he keeps working on his secret moves. The father (although he knows the match is over whenever he wills) prolongs the event for the pleasure of fellowship.        

Our life is often one long wrestling match with God. We think if we work hard enough, we can beat Him. And our Father keeps pinning us and holding us for His pleasure and our good.        

Instead of trying to beat God, why don’t we get to know Him. Why don’t we learn to trust Him.         

Dear God and Father, sine you know everything, you know me inside and out. You know what a mess I have made of things. Rarely do I resist the devil but I often resist You. I say I love You, but I disobey. I say I trust You yet I am always resisting You. I am sorry. Help me defeat me. Help me to die to self. Please dear Lord, deliver me. Thank you for putting up with me. And thank you for forgiving me.  In the name of Your Son, Jesus, who never resisted You, I pray. Amen.

Paul Shero

San Angelo, Texas

Off-Season Training

“All scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.” – 2 Timothy 3:16-17

The temperature has been over 100 degrees a record 51 times already this year.  This summer will probably go down as the hottest ever.  Nowadays, summer workouts take place in most Texas towns – for those getting ready for Friday nights in the fall.  When coaching football, the heat comes with the territory.  It was several degrees over 100 a couple of years ago one summer evening.  Golden sunshine tinted the trees and shadows lengthened, as a lone runner caught my eye.  He looked like one of the players on my football team.  He had already worked out earlier that day – what was he doing running now?

With football season still a couple of months away – his dedication to training impressed me.  Training this way in-season is common.  Training this way in the off-season is not as common.  There are so many distractions and other things to do that take precedent over working out for teenagers.  And yet the off-season warriors consistently push themselves to their personal best, out performing those who begin training in-season.  Readiness characterizes these highly trained athletes.  They are ready at a moment’s notice to face the next opponent.  Seldom surprised, they move with grace and confidence.  Their discipline pays off when needed most.  

I’ve watched this same principle lived out in the lives of godly men and women I’ve known.  They apply themselves to spiritual training, are committed to learning God’s Word, and pursue a life of faith.  Day in and day out, they discipline their minds and hearts to stay in alignment with the truth.  They strengthen their devotion to Christ in spite of circumstances.  They take false thoughts captive.  Then, when they least expect it, their training is called into action.  There’s usually no warning.  It’s a phone call, a medical test, an email, etc.  In an instant, their “opponent” is raging.  Fear, grief and despair threaten.  But they aren’t overwhelmed.  Shaken?  Maybe.  But not devastated.

These past few years I’ve faced events that have shaken me – same as a lot of you.  From losing a bunch of money to an unsettled job situation to death – life has rocked me a few times.  I’ve faced things I never thought I would face, and no one gave me a map to navigate the details of these circumstances.  In the darkness of these times, I’ve held on to what I know to be true in the light.  When my flesh wanted to panic and run screaming, God’s truth told me He will provide.  When I wanted to freak out about making mistakes, God’s wisdom reminded me that everyone sins.  Without training, I’d have collapsed on the floor in a confused puddle of fear.  

Being a person of faith is easy when life is smooth.  It’s easy to love others, be a good steward and make wise decisions when everything is going great.  It’s when there’s no warning and a storm hits that we need to be well-trained.  No one can do this for us.  We are the only ones who can study God’s word.  We are the only ones who can push through a dry season and spend time in prayer.  We do this in-season (when circumstances are rough) and off-season (when circumstances are smooth), so that when the battles of life strike, we are ready.

The good news is you can start your training today.  In fact, you already have by reading this blog.  Take time to read the Bible.  Pray and ask God what He wants you to learn.  Ponder the truths you find and let them burrow in to your heart.  Each time you do this, you’ll be stronger.  And when you face a battle, this discipline and training will pay off in peace, confidence, and joy in spite of your circumstances.

Father – I praise You as the source of all truth.  Help me to have the discipline to read and study the Bible on my own, so that I’m ready when faced with trouble.  I ask for more of your wisdom and discernment to build my life on a solid foundation.  In Jesus’ name.  Amen.

Casey Dacus

Graham, TX

Identity Theft

If you have never been a victim of Identity Theft or had your personal information compromised in anyway then count yourself among the lucky and blessed. If you have gone through this awful experience then my sympathy goes out to you. Recently, I was a potential victim of this crime.  As you can imagine, the last month or so has been anything but enjoyable!  I had to close out all my personal bank accounts, I had to put alerts on my credit profiles, and I had to file numerous reports with the Social Security Administration, the Federal Trade Commission and the Department of Motor Vehicles. The thing that makes this experience the most troubling is how it makes you feel. You feel violated and helpless.  And, it breaks down your willingness to give people the benefit of the doubt in regards to trust.

As it is with anything, when something bad happens to you, you tend to rely on Jesus a little more than normal. Through this I have found myself praying, pleading and asking Jesus to solve this problem for me. Not only have I had the problem of dealing with “Identity Theft,” but through this experience I have found another problem and that is not relying on Jesus 100% of the time. I find myself racing through life trying to conquer things on my own. The majority of the time I do not encounter major problems like the one I just described. But, once something beyond my control happens, I automatically turn to the One Who has the power to fix everything.

But, why is that? That is not fair to Jesus. Why don’t I rely on him totally even when I’m not having “problems” of one kind or another? These questions are far more important than my Identity issue and constantly make me think of just how far I get out of line with my Christian journey.

Jesus wants our identity and personal information. After all he went to the cross for us. When you take a step back and ponder the fact of losing your identity, it is a horrifying thing. But, losing your identity to Jesus is brings much comfort. James 4: 7-10 says, “Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Grieve, mourn and wail. Change your laughter to mourning and your joy to gloom. Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.”

Holy Father, thank you for loving us. Your love and forgiveness are rejuvenating. Dear God, forgive us for not relying on you 100% of the time. When this happens, we are always reminded that you are in control and deserve that control. Dear God, thank you for loving us and we love you. Amen.

Landon Kribbs
Springtown, Texas

Looking in the Right Places

Recently, the words of this song intrigued my thoughts:

"Blessings" BY LAURA STORY

"We pray for blessings
We pray for peace
Comfort for family, protection while we sleep
We pray for healing, for prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering
All the while, You hear each spoken need
Yet love us way too much to give us lesser things

‘Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

We pray for wisdom
Your voice to hear
And we cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt Your goodness, we doubt Your love
As if every promise from Your Word is not enough
All the while, You hear each desperate plea
And long that we'd have faith to believe

‘Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
And what if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

When friends betray us
When darkness seems to win
We know the pain reminds this heart
That this is not, this is not our home,
It's not our home

‘Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
And what if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can’t satisfy
And what if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are your mercies in disguise"

As the days shorten, I long for the days of spring. The trees appear melancholy with their bare limbs of winter.In wisdom and power, You created the cycles of life. Your Spirit and Word guide us and teach us that You are always with us. Never, never will You leave us, but my feeble heart needs reminding.

Thank You, for the reassurance of Your goodness and Your presence, especially that lonely winter morning.

Often times when I’m alone, You are close and my mind is stayed on You.

But that day, You seemed far away. Sadness engulfed my heart.

Tenderly I was reminded of Your love;

a graceful red bird landed in the “naked” tree outside the window.

Your love washed over me like a fountain. You are with me, blessing me in

the lonely, “winter” days of life. You know each concern of the heart.

You desire faith in You alone.

Would the red bird have caught my eye in the fullness of spring,

possibly hidden beneath the foliage I dearly crave? How often do Your

blessings flow through the things we dread or fear?

Forgive me Father, for the short-sightedness of my heart’s longings. Shape my heart to be more like Jesus-looking to the eternal and not to momentary comforts and joys in this world. Thank You for the seasons of our lives where You teach us faith lessons over and over again.

Mischelle Oliver

Stephenville, Texas

On Our Way to Trust

Series: Trusting God in Hard Times

“And we know that God causes all things to work together for good for those who love God, to those who are called according to His purposes.”

“If God is for us, who can be against us?”

Count it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.” (Romans 8:28, 31; James 1:2-4)

These words from Paul and James are familiar to most believers. They are favorite “go-to” verses for a lot of people. And, they read quickly. But, how often has a moment in life left us speechless in the presence of these familiar texts? Traveling across the terrain of thought encompassed in these texts was anything but a walk in the park. It more aptly resembled intergalactic travel!

I recall listening to a dear sister tossing these verses on the floor in a conversation a few years ago as she unloaded her struggle to trust God through a particularly difficult time in her life. She said, “I feel so weak. I feel so ashamed. I’ve known these verses all my life. I know how I should respond to this situation, but my heart is so distracted, heavy and weak. I just thought I was more mature than this.”

Ever felt like that? I have on more than one occasion. Trials can find the seam between knowledge and conviction and test its strength. And, it doesn’t take long for the test results to come back to us.

One of the misconceptions about faith is that if we know the truth we can (and should!) snap it into place when trials crash into our lives. Truth is, most of us don’t respond to hard times in an intellectually snappy way.

Graciously, God has scattered across the landscape of scripture realistic pictures of “trust in action”. In our hurry to get to a good verse on trust (and I confess I’ve done it more than once!) we look past these blessed pictures.

Throughout the book of Psalms the Spirit has given us psalms of lament. (Individual lament: 3, 4, 5, 7, 9-10, 13, 14, 17, 22, 25, 26, 27, 28, 31, 36, 39, 40:12-17, 41, 42-43, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 57, 59, 61, 64, 70, 71, 77, 86, 89, 120, 139, 141, 14; Community lament: 12, 44, 58, 60, 74, 79, 80, 83, 85, 89, 90, 94, 123, 126, 129; Penitential: 6, 32, 38, 51, 102, 130, 143; Imprecatory: 35, 69, 83, 88, 109, 137, 140). While many of the Psalms focus on praising God, a huge chunk of the book focuses on lament. The writers kick and scream at life situations. They throw familiar theology around the room like a bouncing ball. They lay it all on the living room carpet! They don’t work out faith in minutes; it takes days, weeks and months. Trial to trust is not a straight line.

Then there is Job. He was a righteous man. But, after a week of silence and “blessed be the name of the Lord”…well…he takes God to task. He rifles questions at God. He even curses the day he was born! Trial to trust is not a straight line.

Then there is Jesus. Even though his moves are in concert with His Father’s purposes and the knowledge of messianic scriptures are etched into his mind, he doesn’t turn himself in and say “let’s move to trial!” He collapses into prayer in the garden of Gethsemane…3 times. Hebrews 5:7 provides us with a glimpse into Jesus heart: “In the days of his flesh Jesus offered up prayers and supplications with loud cries and tears to him who was able to save him from death, and he was heard because of his reverence.” Even for the Savior, trial to trust was not lived in a straight line. It comes with difficulty, struggle and lots of emotion.

Surrendering our lives to God is a meandering road. Thoughts, impulses, questions, and emotions play off one another in the presence of “trust verses” when we are traveling across the rocky terrain of a particularly trying moment. Control. Security. Safety. Avoidance of pain. That’s how we’re wired. But, trust is so counter to who we are as human beings. “Speak Lord, your servant is listening” is a scary proposition. “Not my will, but yours be done” is equally unsettling. I’m not sure where the idea came from that we cruise through faith challenges with a bible and a calculator. The truth of the matter is nobody does it that way. Life hurts. We feel pain. The unknown scares us. And, to add insult to injury, to think that our “back and forth” in moments of trial is anything short of normal fuels our weakness and makes us vulnerable to the kind of collapse that the Evil One is hoping to achieve in our rocky moments.

Like you, I’m so thankful the Holy Spirit has blessed us with an honest picture of what trusting God looks and sounds like. The transparency of the psalmists. The candid speeches in the book of Job. Jesus’ example of how to wrestle trust into place. We need them all. We need them because “unpredictables” still happen. We need to know that it is okay to cry. To sit in silence before the Lord. To scream if need be. To ask people to pray for us because we don’t know how to pray. To tell God that we are in a strange situation and feel like infants who can’t tell their left hand from their right. It’s all part and parcel of how you fit yourself into the skin of trust.

Prayer
O Lord, thank you for being Faithful and True. Thank you for being near to us and promising that you will never forsake us. And, thank you for showing us what it means to stumble and stagger our way into your arms. Strengthen our hearts with such a reminder when we find ourselves in uncharted territory. When life doesn’t’ make sense. When we flat don’t know what to do next. Weave your word into our hearts in a more mature way that we might know you are with us in the “back and forth” that is our faith coming of age. Amen.

Randy Daugherty
Stephenville, Texas

Trusting Him

Series: Trusting God in Hard Times

I spent Thanksgiving week in the hospital with my sister. She had a routine procedure which was complicated by a mineral imbalance. Her procedure was on Monday and we were still there on Thursday, Thanksgiving Day, which was three days longer than expected. Nights are not very restful in hospitals with nurse visits every 4 hours and blood work in between. On Wednesday night at about 2 am, I remember the technician drawing blood. The look of desperation on my sister’s face was so intense. We all wanted to go home, but she especially wanted to go home. It was more than just getting out of the hospital. It was imposing a strange gloom on her that was turning into depression. As soon as the technician left early that morning and I saw her face, I had this deep impulse to pray in the most raw and honest way. With her hands held in mine, I prayed a prayer of complete surrender. I asked our Father to show His power in a quick, obvious, unequivocal way by making her get better. It was through raw emotion and overwhelming tears that I petitioned Him. After thanking Him for His Son and for His grace offered so freely, I uttered the word, “Amen.” At that very instant, I had a calming peace and confidence in knowing that we–my sister and I–had completely, wholeheartedly surrendered, trusting the Lord would deliver.

Her next lab result would not show a significant improvement, but our faith and trust remained. We continued to hope her condition would improve, AND IT DID! Our family spent Thanksgiving Day in the hospital and shared that holiday meal with other families in the same situation. We had so much to be thankful for. We had each other! Even though her condition prevented her from going home, it wasn’t life threatening. Yes, it was inconvenient, but she was alive. We all are alive! This ‘hard’ time for my family certainly doesn’t compare to what many people have experienced in their own hard times. But, it was a moment in time for me that was difficult–one that I had struggled with surrendering.

Sometimes I fail to fully surrender to His power and mercy. When I finally reach the point of realizing I am not in control and His will must be made complete, do I finally TRUST Him to take care of it! Placing complete trust in Him brings a peace and confidence in knowing the situation will be resolved according to His eternal plan.

I am encouraged by these scriptures, perhaps you will be too:
And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. To Him be the power forever and ever. (1 Peter 5:10-11)

I will lead the blind by ways they have not known, along unfamiliar paths I will guide them; I will turn the darkness into light before them and make the rough places smooth. These are the things I will do; I will not forsake them. (Isaiah 42:16)

Father, thank you for loving me enough to send your Son to Calvary for my sin. Forgive me, Father, when I fail to trust you in ALL things. Help me to completely surrender my whole life to you. Thank you for your love and grace. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Michelle Tittor
Cleburne, Texas

Hard Times

Series: Trusting God in Hard Times

HARD TIMES! What are they? According to WIKIPEDIA , to give someone a “hard time” is to cause difficulty for that person, or to treat that person severely. Hard times are very personal. Satan has a way of knowing just how to tempt us. What you consider severe treatment I may “blow off” and ignore. Everyone has “hard times,” most of us more than once, many of us frequently. If you haven’t had any, be assured that they will come. Some people even seem to live their lives waiting for the next “hard time.” As Stephen C. Foster wrote in his song, “My Old Kentucky Home,” “By’n by hard times comes a-knocking at the door, . .”

We are promised hard times if we live as Christians. We may be ridiculed, lied about, ignored, forsaken by those we love, scorned by others. Business may be destroyed, possessions wiped out. And these are just the easy problems! What about the tortures of the early Christians? Have you known anyone recently who died for The Faith? Whose family has been ripped apart, taken into slavery? No one I know has been thrown to the lions, or burned at the stake, or even whipped to death, for any reason, much less for The Faith. If I had my own “trial by fire,” could I endure?

When I was in high school, a girl I knew had not one, but two abortions (both illegal at that time). I could not believe that anyone would do this! I already believed, without discussion with anyone else, that life begins at conception. My reading of God’s Word had made this plain to me. While in high school, I promised myself, deep inside myself, that I would never intentionally cause harm to any child of mine, before or after birth. Without consultation with any human, this was my conviction

During the 1950’s and ‘60’s there was an especially hard epidemic of Rubella, a usually harmless “childhood” disease. About 25% of babies whose mothers contracted Rubella during the first trimester of pregnancy were born with “congenital rubella syndrome.” As quoted from kidshealth.org:

Rubella in a pregnant woman can cause congenital rubella syndrome, with potentially devastating consequences for the developing fetus. Children who are infected with rubella before birth are at risk for growth retardation; mental retardation; malformations of the heart and eyes; deafness; and liver, spleen, and bone marrow problems. Nothing that medicine or other therapies could offer would positively affect the outcome of the pregnancy.

I contracted Rubella between the second and third months of my second pregnancy, the absolute worst time to have it because of all the development occurring in the baby at that time. My immunity prior to my breaking out with the tell-tale spots was “zero.” After all signs of the disease were gone, my immunity was so high it could not be accurately measured. While in training as a Speech Pathologist, I had worked with both children and their parents following the birth of a child with “congenital rubella syndrome.” I had seen the heartbreak of the parents, the handicaps of the children, who frequently were unable to care for themselves or learn past normal 3 – 5 year development. Now, I felt, I had caused this “curse” on my own child whom I wanted so much! HARD TIMES had hit!

My doctor insisted on an abortion. Colorado had just passed the first abortion law in the United States. It stated if two doctors agreed that continuation of the pregnancy would result in serious medical or emotional problems for either the fetus or the mother, a legal abortion could be performed. So, I could fly there, have the abortion, come home, and all would be well. One major problem my doctor had not considered…Me!I wanted this child, but I wanted this child to be healthy! Here I was, carrying this life conceived on purpose in love, yet, as I reasoned then, I was responsible for (i.e., blamed) for his ruined life! (I have since learned the difference between responsibility and blame.) I felt, “How could I bear to sentence my child to a life of extreme difficulty hardship? How could I handle it?” Yet I knew I couldn’t purposely kill this child! I dove into a deep depression.

I told my doctor, “No.” Paul (my husband) was in complete agreement with me. But very few people were. I lived the next seven months in torture, mentally, physically, and spiritually. I continued to suffer from depression, yet I had to care for our year-and-one-half old daughter every day, and try to keep our home going. I could hardly tolerate for anything to touch my skin. I felt like I was stung by everything that touched me. So the doctor put me on pain killers and anti-depressants (both dangerous to a developing fetus).I spent my afternoons during our daughter’s nap time writhing in agony on the bed, sobbing repeatedly, “Oh, God, please!” That is ALL I could pray for seven months! I could do nothing but endure. My faith was so weak!

I had yet to internalize the scripture from Romans 8:26-27:

In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God’s will. (NIV)

Through the Spirit’s intervention Almighty God heard my prayers. Our son was born a healthy 8+ pounds. His development was precociously fast; he totally defied all human predictions regarding rubella syndrome. This child whom medical experts said I should abort is a faithful son to God, his Heavenly Father. He has known from an early age, Who saved him from a lifetime of disabilities. How could anyone have suggested that I terminate that life? I praise God daily for His merciful kindness!

That was truly a “Hard Time” for me. I learned that if God, in all His love and power, could see me through constant seven-month anguish, could and did protect our son from the ravages of rubella syndrome, He can and will see me through anything this world has to strike me with. His answer is not always the one I seek. But in His perfect love, “. . . we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” (Rom. 8:28, NIV)

How did I get through that “Hard Time”? Prayer! Intervention of the Spirit! In my weakness I did not understand the intervention of the Spirit. But God was, as He always is, faithful. His Word is perfect, His promises are true, our trust in Him will prove His love. Some babies are born with disabilities, some acquire them. Not everything we pray for will receive the answer we seek, but God wants to send only His best for our eternity. Sometimes He sends HARD TIMES! and we grow. But He will see us through. This life is brief. He who endures shall receive a crown of life, forever no Hard Times but PERFECT “TIMES” with our God!

Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him. James 1:12 (NIV). . . Be faithful, even to the point of death, and I will give you the crown of life. Rev. 2:10 (NIV)Almighty God, help us to know You better, to trust You, to love You, to believe that You want only the best for us. Sustain us through our “Hard Times.” Help us to trust that You know what is best, and that truly “Good Times” on earth are only those times we live in service and love to You. Thank you for the intervention of your Spirit, who helps us know and love You more. Through Jesus, our Savior, Amen.

Marilyn Schulze
Stephenville, Texas